ialexstone
I am a resident of the hotel of love-
And you are the one who gave me lease;
I cannot leave
It's too addicting
You're always around
And i'm always surrounded
I'm never alone
even if sometimes I feel alone
But I know you're there
Not too far away.
It's a rollercoaster of emotions
Trying to upkeep
And keep it all glued together
But I know,
That It'll work out
I never want to leave.
All I hear anymore is a faint ringing-
It haunts my brain
It Haunts my soul, and inner being
Anxiety-
I can't stop picking up signals
It's overwhelming
but you,
You're right there in front on me
A memory
Or so it feels like
But you're real
Standing tall
With arms wide open-
You tell me things are going to be okay;
As you say i look apprehensive
You console me
and slowly-
Very slowly the anxiety is dissapating
Very slowly, the ringing is leaving my body
Thank you for being mine.
I almost had you-
Things couldn't have been more perfect
then you had to go and FUCK it up
I told you not to
I can't force you to want me
and I am going to have to get over you.
it'll take time
because I am so bitter towards you.
because you chose someone else over me
which makes me feel inferior
and small
and unworthy
terrible
sad
and upset
my spirit broke
even though we spent a short time together.
I thought it was worth a million lifetimes.
Happy holidays you sack of shit.
I hope you enjoy it with the one you care about
I know it won't make any difference to you that you hurt me.
you'll still be smiling, laughing, kissing, loving
don't worry, you'll see the mistake you made eventually-
because I AM worth it
all those fuckers that broke my heart will see the mistake they made
when they're 10 years down the road as miserable as anything.
realizing that they could've had it all.
I don't deserve heartache, no one does.
cheers, douchebags.
Why in the FUCK do I always do this to myself-
My mind is always thinking about shit, which makes me do dumb things.
Like chase boys around for no reason,
I'm so lonely all the time
Where did this come from?
What the hell happened-
Always incomplete thoughts are what are in my head. They never seem to finish themselves..
Fear and Loading-
Those are my emotions lately-
I have no idea what is going to happen, but now that there are feelings involved on both parties- Yikes..
I hate how I am sometimes..
today,
I saw you in the mirror-
and it brought back memories
dear god i've missed you.
I can't believe you're here!
How'd you sneak in?
i sit down in front of the mirror,
and hold my hand out-
you reach out
and put yours into mine
that feeling, in the pit of my stomach
i have butterflies.
i saw you, in the mirror
then blinked, and saw me.
You may not be able to see-
But I can,
Right through the blackness
take my hand
i'll lead you
and you can follow
if you can
just be still
listen, breathe and feel the darkness
It's not so bad, is it?
You cannot see me
you cannot see yourself
we cannot see each other
we're hiding where its safe and sound
don't cry darling, we will not be found
just close your eyes, and breathe
see what you want to see
the lights are off
we can go anywhere you want to, just tell me where
take my hand, i'll show you how easy it is to escape
look where we are now.
they will never be able to find us here
it is safe and we are warm and happy
it's okay to smile.
All these noises
All these sights
They are all better with you by my side
All these emotions
All these feelings
They are all better when I'm feeling them with you
Our adventures will take us places
To places that only people dream of
Our time will come
Let's not worry about it, my dear
Let's enjoy what we get to hear
Let's enjoy what we get to see
Side by side
Let's enjoy what we get to feel
Let's enjoy what we have
Side by side.
And no one will ever be able to take away our memories.
I can't think right now
Everyone around
they're all just blurs
moving at a million miles an hour
and i'm a snail
in a huge world. they're all giants
it's all an act
I know this.
60 seconds isn't long enough
To talk and tell you about what's in my mind
About what wheels are turning
And what
Could possibly
Be surrounding me
And how it's effecting my thoughts
Is it really my perspective?
Or is it
The rest of the world
Forcing their outlooks on life
Upon me.
I suppose neither of us will ever really know.
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