sign up or log in for additional features. (It's free!)
Sideburns are hairy. They’re gross, and for old men with mullets. Men with ridiculously long sideburns should shave them, no matter how manly they feel they are.
By Abby on 05.29.2011
There were a great many things that Constance could abide. Profanity, strange eating habits, and the occasional bigotry. What she couldn’t abide were sideburns. The poor choice in hairstyle made her think that this mechanic had poor choice in tools and craft.
By J.M.Oneil URL on 05.29.2011
I saw Kevin Jonas with sideburns once. It was weird. He was on Camp Rock 1 and 2. DSo was Demi Lovato. She is really good at sining. She’s on So Random the hit comedy show about a comedy show. Steling Night is on that show. I like his acting.
By Alexis on 05.29.2011
itchy, scratchy. Gross on guys who can’t pull it off/ are ugly. Reminds me of that one guy from that 70’s show…what’s his face. Also makes me think Lt. Dan from Forest Gump….She tasted like cigarettes..
By Alexandra URL on 05.29.2011
wierdwierdwierdwierdwierdwierdwierdickyickyickyickycierwierdwierdwierdwierd I’m sorry my friend’s discriminating people who have sideburns. It’s not a bad thing I guess. Maybe. Hey im not being descrimitory i jst dnt lk sideburnz.
They looked good on Elvis. They do not look good on 50 year old women. Even if they are blonde and fuzzy. They are not stray eyebrows. You cannot ignore them. hmm.
By Lola McCracken on 05.29.2011
Are probably the ugliest things I have ever seen. No, you are not a member of The Beatles, you can not pull off what they have done. Not to say that you have to be a Beatle or Elvis Presley, though he was pretty bad looking with them. This travesty of hair just needs to stop: it doesn’t make you manlier, and it definitely does not make you sexier.
By Lindsey on 05.29.2011
old men with sideburns arent quite as scary as young ones. i suppose its because they are supposed to have them. or is that just me supposing? im not sure ask the men. im not one. or you could ask genetics or something. suppose? yes i suppose. we all suppose its genetics perhaps. suppose…
By Charlotte on 05.29.2011
you make my heart
feel something undescribeable
for something more
to see what we’ll have instore.
By Just Jes URL on 05.29.2011
i donr know about sideburns but it may be refering to the burning feeling we get when we sleep in inappropriate directions that stresses on sides. or bay be about the burning of side things of a already burninng things.
By ravi on 05.29.2011
I remember my 6th grade geography teacher, a man by the name of Chris Blaymires. Mr. Blaymires had the most disgustingly thick, bushy, revolting sideburns I’ve ever seen in my life. Like Jesus Christ, what the hell. I’d say this is a failure of a OneWord, but you know what, I have nothing else for as stupid of a word as sideburns.
By Riley Frost on 05.29.2011
loved them in the 70’s…some are cool..it depends on the person…handle bars on the face? continuation of the hairline…more maintenance? messy-double edge look. $$ maker?
By Newbee on 05.29.2011
i think of jews they can be long curly. shorts. sometimes people think they are ugly and show that the person has no hygiene but facial hair is nice sometimes.
By Claire on 05.29.2011
“Why do I always have sideburns,” she asked for the hundredth time.
“It was the style back then, sweetheart. Besides, you look cute in the photo.”
“No, she looks handsome,” her brother teased.
“Sideburns.” She shook her head in disgust.
By Raymond Masters URL on 05.29.2011
Her honey breath stroked his face; they were so close that he could see his own eyes reflected in her . A soft coil of gold settled on his neck as she tilted her face towards him, her lips brushing the rough outline of his jaw.
By d URL on 05.29.2011
sideburns are pretty cool if you think about them. although many consider them to be gross, think about how long they take to grow, perfect, and tame. i mean, hey, elvis wore them. why can’t everyone else? go sideburns!
By Andrea Elizabeth on 05.29.2011
are weird especially muttenchops, i think thats what they’re called. I don’t know I don’t really like facial hair, I goes hand in hand with like not being clean and I do not like people who are not clean. Yucky.
By Roxy URL on 05.29.2011
Anchorman is one of the best movies EVER! Afternoon delight GENIUS!
I had sex with VERONICA CORNINGSTONE! THATS RIGHT SEX! AND IM NOT TO SCREAM IT FROM THE TOPS OF THE MOUNTAINS!
By Brandon Barnes on 05.29.2011
How bout you, sideburns? you want some of this milk? Hipsters with glasses and fat sideburns, tight jeans & boots with spurs — clinking down the Williamsburg avenues like men in a western, but without the guns or the bravado, or, it must be said, the badassery. But a deal more pretension.
By grovestrolls on 05.29.2011
his stupid sideburns always hung down around his neck. He really didn’t understand how dumb he looked until everyone started calling his Elvis.
He was still confused.
People then started gifting him elvis-like clothes.
Finally, he got it.
By Jake Godek on 05.29.2011
sideburns…joe jonas…i was obsessed with those bros…long ago they sweeped my walls in cheap paper out of one of those special edition people magazines… they look nasty kevin aka sam…get rid of them!
By brighterwriter13 URL on 05.29.2011
My father wore horseshoe sideburns in the seventies. I think I even tried it once when I could grow hair on my face but it looked like shit. It’s an odd look, really. Unless, of course, you wear bell-bottoms.
By Eric on 05.29.2011
They’ve gotta be done well. Otherwise, you’re just a poor excuse for an Elvis impersonator. I had to check to see if my husband has them. He does. ;) This is the sorriest excuse
By Lindsay Goodwin URL on 05.29.2011
They are fuzzy and ickey on the wrong person, few can wear them sexy, they cannot be bushy or long.. mutton chops look a mess… who first came up with that idea?? SHAVE!!!
By Georgia D on 05.29.2011
Dapper he was, he made me want to just pull on those crazy sideburns. I’ve never had this urge before, quite amusing.
By Jennifer on 05.29.2011
hair men fluffy itchy gross unattractive prickly scratchy no
By Paula on 05.29.2011
I love a man with sideburns. Not starburns, just sideburns. Big, unruly sideburns. I want to pet them and run my fingers through them. Sideburns sideburns sideburns. I need sideburns in my life.
By Emily on 05.29.2011
men. ive never seen a women with sideburns. sideburns reminds me of nicki minaj’s lyrics “my pussy on your sideburns”. why would you ever want to put your vagina on someone’s face like that? that is so freggin weird. okay. i guess it’s some sort of sexual fetish i guess.
By Christine on 05.29.2011
velcro strips line each side of his face
By bethany URL on 05.29.2011
I new I had to do it. My complete lack of boobs allowed my facial hair to let people mistake me for a man and I was sick of it. I was ready to be a pretty girl. THE pretty girl. Until something worse than sideburns happened…razor burn.
By Bailey URL on 05.29.2011
i am not really sure if i have sideburns. im a female and it’s usually the boys who get these sideburns. but im not really sure if i do or do not have these. maybe i do, it’s just, girls’ sideburns are not that showy. besides, we usually have long hairs so it doesn’t really show that much.
By hi-c on 05.29.2011
He didn’t know what to do with himself
He was alone, lost in the crowd
He didn’t stand out,
But he should have
He was just another piece of grass in a large field
But who was he?
He was just himself.
Who was himself?
That’s what everyone wanted to know.
He didn’t know much about the world,
Life itself was a juggle
A race that never ended,
But wasn’t that what is was for everyone else?
That’s what everyone wanted to know.
Who was different was the smallest question of them all-
The biggest question was,
Are you the different one?
By jaay on 05.29.2011
Joe Mauer has the best sideburns ever. David Tennant’s are awesome too. They’re named after that Civil War guy, Burnside. I’d like to grow great sideburns also, but I don’t know how well I’d be able to pull it off. Yeah.
By Robert on 05.29.2011
His sideburns were glorious, all two inches of the magnificent copper-colored hair. She sighed, wanting to reach out and touch the small patches of fur but resisted, knowing they were too much for her to be able to handle.
By Dibmeister on 05.29.2011
Old people in a biker gang with gray hair and a motorcycle and creepy old guys who are stalkers with scraggly hair and just really weird people.
By La-a LaDay URL on 05.29.2011
sideburn trends are popular today
men paint them with polish to cover the greys
some straighten them some curl them
around their fingers they twirl them
some just don’t care and let theirs fray.
By Javier Shopek URL on 05.29.2011
The sergeant had sideburns that smelt of sweet-vanilla. To Boye, it was overpowering.
“Now, what’s this we have here with this pizza-box here”
By Carson on 05.29.2011
sideburns make dudes look like western pedophiles. i am always suspicious of anyone who has them, bikers included. i don’t think there is any possible way of making sideburns look good or trendy. if anyone ever does manage to do so, may they get struck by rainbow lightning.
By elizabeth on 05.29.2011
General burnside. We learned about him in ms. frazee’s 8th grade history class. She mentioned how awkward it must be go give a man like that a kiss. quite funny…
By Lora on 05.29.2011
i really hate sideburns, they remind me of elvis presley. i really have never liked them and i don’t know why anyone would. now if it was a 5 o’clock shadow that would be different but forget the old kind.
By Deborah on 05.29.2011
a division of Identity Crisis, Inc.