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healthy
Not my life at this point. Physically. Emotionally. Spiritually. why would this be my first word?! resentment. Pain Agony Heart break. Self inflicted. Marriage divorce? This makes me absolutely angry. Why am I not healthy? How can I become healthy? What do I need to filter out in order to be whole again? Who needs to go? Is it me? Move? Tears begin to form. Heart begins to welt. Spirit begins to burst. I need to follow my spirit more often too. Following my spirit is the only thing I know to be safe, yet the most risk taking. I'm tired of being broken and I know it's only through Christ that I can be made whole. What am I so afraid of? Why am I choosing to be unhealthy and unhappy? Another 'lifestyle' will only make me miserable, but that embrace was the closest thing I've felt to complete, ever. Is it worth being a slave to misery? no. Why am I so conflicted?