Comments Posted By Saudade

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resident

you foster position in my yellow rooms
your voices is cadence like gauze curtains
pulled back in the wind, into yellow room
like this, your words and mine fit together
your words become the surface of my skin
my painted concrete walls
your words are a puff, are planetary rings around me
like this my body breathes with the breath of my

» Posted By Saudade On 03.27.2017 @ 12:15 am

resolve

calm the surface these covers flipping waving turned back
bring me closer to this touch this touch all over me
quit the sea the crashing flow the fall of all all over me

» Posted By Saudade On 01.01.2017 @ 12:57 pm

dash

arms crossed and the goods careening out
grocery bags stumble and kiss the ground
she’s running and-
is something before or behind?
is a woman more likely to run away or have
something desperate to get to before her?
the rape statistics, the catcalls, the fear in her
eyes never turns down
the dial up high – but still
damn, there’s a lot, a goal, a peaked tower
a place to be and woman’s right to fucking be there –
to aim for

» Posted By Saudade On 12.29.2016 @ 10:05 pm

resignation

sign me over to the gods
we don’t know their names,
they who seek to give us hope
those whose hope is reason enough to live
who allow sun to trickle in earthly direction
of course, we do not know them
allow me to to swaddled, passed from arm
thin darklit arm to hairy freckled arm to
allow me to be given them as offering
my eyes to close and earth turned down
wisp of quiet curtain against my soul

» Posted By Saudade On 12.21.2016 @ 8:08 pm

lease

spoil with your touch
my skin
keep it sullen newborn easy
keep my heart swaddled keep it pleased
and smiling with curling lips like unfinished ferns
soft with dew and green and fuzz of leaf to come
capture my heart
tug it loose with your warm
press it against you

» Posted By Saudade On 12.16.2016 @ 12:38 pm

release all that you have not with me upon me
do not let it go shy and turn down its head
do not let me keep it clear
only to rear up with teeth and scorn
do not let my presence fire burn you
in my absence
keep me honest
keep you honest
keep us honest both and one

» Posted By Saudade On 12.16.2016 @ 12:34 pm

witchcraft

Masked:

palimpsests
over-arched with perched phrasings
most precise, more impeccable
than the first
there are so many books
whose words like pools of sweat
have been worth naught
are now worth less
on creaked-wood shelves
that topple with bankruptcy
as often as fires
it goes
becomes again
and never has been

» Posted By Saudade On 12.05.2016 @ 10:26 pm

Revival:

crescendos
streams into microphones
only end when the crowd has whispered their last critique
sent glances o’er shoulders
launched themselves, laughing, at lovers
whose love will end
god
scream for me
they never end
they never cease
they never stop feeling the scream
rapping in the dead end of their mind

» Posted By Saudade On 12.05.2016 @ 10:23 pm

hearts across palms
seared there with kisses
there is so much
shivering naked in rooms I walked into
these witches
press fingers against me
lead me
by the blanket’s warm hem

» Posted By Saudade On 12.05.2016 @ 10:18 pm

savings

it’s like the world is saving up all its positive moments right now, scrimping hard so that later there’ll be plenty but it means right now, there’s just sorrow, there’s just tragedy, there’s just pain and no fucking reprieve

it means that right now, the being here doesn’t feel worth it. almost ever.

» Posted By Saudade On 06.15.2016 @ 1:46 am

undone

each day that passes in this skin
this – new – skin
this one i inhabit recklessly and that falls from me
loosely
and drapes across the encrouaching ground
and is warm, but sometimes over-warm
can’t sleep at night heat
each day
I wonder how this shedding, molting,
becoming
works

» Posted By Saudade On 05.15.2016 @ 7:59 pm

welcoming

Standing on doorstep, we want you to open, but we don’t want you you language, the phraseture you offer, we just want – you decor, aesthetic, welcome us, but don’t stay for our visit

» Posted By Saudade On 12.01.2015 @ 12:33 pm

exclude

Accuracy:

pinpoint
there’s a trickle down
blood smear just off the side,
that bullet hole fine
bull’s eye
the blood looks
like times I’ve hallucinated
red
running down my arms,
my legs
it looks just like those trickle lines
i feel

» Posted By Saudade On 11.23.2015 @ 1:18 am

Take me out of the game, I’m done
Basketballs raining down at my head never gave me that good adrenaline, that kind of high that makes you want to play
Running jokes make me want to fade into couches and come back another day when your friendship, your flirtation, are made of smiles and thumb wars that turned to held hands and flower crowns and talking about what the silence means in avant garde movies
But boy, I’m telling you now, I’ll deal with that
I never signed up to love a boy who steals your smiles and shuts the cupboard door, though
And I think it’s time I exclude myself from that game

» Posted By Saudade On 11.23.2015 @ 1:14 am

shred

Give me all the pieces, baby, give me you when you’re not whole no more, not self no more, just shredded paper or sawdust or the dry salt remains of tears. Do it, because I know you want to. I’ve watched you years, hell I’ve helped you years. You’re not the kind to get help, not the kind to believe in yourself, you’re the kind to take falling down as a chance to make gravity your lover and the depths of the world your aim. Give me your pieces, give me your fallen apart, ripped apart, gone gone gone self, because when you’re cracked all open, the nut in the middle is all the joy you’ve got.

» Posted By Saudade On 11.19.2015 @ 6:28 pm

flee

Faulted:

blow fingers cold fingers sink heat into their surface edges
ease warmth into the shred of bone
open mouth to suck on wad of fingers
skin turned smooth with numb and sweat a slick perfume
that falls like holy water over bundled up fabric-covered skin
think of the hunters whose fur smells of animal heat
think of the fire reared up in their blood
think of the arrows pierced through their lives
arrows of gunpowder and metal,
not clean and fresh-cut wood
think of how wood is gone and now we shiver
in the drafts of eerie concrete brought to delete
the warm flickering of lives

» Posted By Saudade On 10.18.2015 @ 1:12 pm

step out from the shadow of chrysanthemums blink blink, right
step over the earth until there is no more earth
shimmy through the stretches of dirt fumbling around you
bountiful
exit the earth, and exit it’s green stalks unfurled high
exit the pretence of these green structures,
leave behind the pools of sweet water that wet your spindle feet
come away to the away where blankness overtakes
undone, this animal presence
undone, this messy human thing

» Posted By Saudade On 10.18.2015 @ 1:05 pm

willpower

Hold you back strong
He will still cut down with sceptre
With scissor blade
Hold muscles against the ripping of her hand from yours
Sky with bring lightning, slick rain
Will wrench your hand from piano-fingered hand
The will to stay does not create your fate

» Posted By Saudade On 10.07.2015 @ 5:06 pm

psycho

Ah yes, he says the word as though he has been walking inside my head, as though my head is a forest, calm in the crisp fall air, where the trees have begun to relinquish their leaves but the ground has not yet begun to embrace them in their throngs. He says it softly, and with that same calm as forest air, still as tree who watch with no morals, who do not judge, I hear it: “psycho”.

» Posted By Saudade On 09.08.2015 @ 9:06 pm

switched

Climbers:

Hand over hand over… fuck
She didn’t want to be here anymore, her partner’s plump buttocks scooting upwards in front of her. She’d come for the wine, the sex, the way this place could make her dirtiest hentai dreams reality. She didn’t come for fucking adventure.

(not that good…)

» Posted By Saudade On 05.04.2015 @ 11:11 am

Instructor:

Give it to me, he demanded in a way that flickered with a question just at its edge. That made her pause, a pause she stumbled over, trying to continue walking in a way that wouldn’t give her away yet. Something was giving him away. Her instructor, there was something under the surface. It seemed almost – unfathomably – like he was afraid of her. She smirked, just a little, something else she wouldn’t let him see. She was still walking, arms outstretched to give him back his hallowed book, but wherever the upped hand was, he no longer had it.

» Posted By Saudade On 05.04.2015 @ 11:09 am

Flicked off, and there’s the kind of dark only the moon can quell, but the moon’s out tonight, and damn, she looks like it don’t matter that Martina’s gone and he’s sitting here alone with a cold beer crooning away on the guitar, and he’s glad now, that those lights switched off with that twitchy power surge, because now he’s got the moon to love, and that’s all he ever needed.

» Posted By Saudade On 05.04.2015 @ 10:48 am

projector

Flashing screen, wide and bold and lights all through my eyes, diving, star neon projection peeling back in acid blooms, folding inside my eyes and brain and shriveling my nerves

» Posted By Saudade On 04.17.2015 @ 1:30 pm

detergent

Slosh it all over the basin, some cross between tears and fits of anger in your eyes,
wipe down the counter and turn round to smash dishes in the drain board, and know this is your job, and feel guilty cuz *fuck* it’s just one of those things that *are* fair, clearly, but that you don’t seem to have the energy to do… and when your glass is chucked down, and splinters there on the cold tile, you turn and sigh, but you’ve got nothing to blame.

» Posted By Saudade On 03.27.2015 @ 7:20 pm

provider

It’s like it used to be, where my energy drained out my ears in the effort it took to hear voices of those who’ve been no concern. It’s like it used to be, where my eyes flicker too slowly to let you know there’s nothing beyond them but empty fear. It’s like it used to be, where the cliff falls off, you’re over there, she’s coming at me, needing me, and I can’t jump, can’t fall, can’t meet her, can’t provide an answer to any possibility. Like it was when I disappeared last time.

» Posted By Saudade On 03.24.2015 @ 1:49 pm

ballet

Twirl like your mother was there when you were young
and when you go home, swear like a hyena yells
grab your knickers and head downtown
it’s not like you’re a crazy bastard
just that you were raised to expect
a certain kind of cruelty
That tragic ballet endings can’t cut out of your system

» Posted By Saudade On 03.21.2015 @ 3:25 pm

goods

Sealed:

Popped down on top, screwed shut with the air hissing in and staying they, winding around her in the glass jar, her very own genie box, her suffocating, drowning in these close up clear walls – but oh
oh
she could breathe,
and so she breathed,
and snuggles herself against the smooth cylinder wall,
and smiled her isolation away

» Posted By Saudade On 03.08.2015 @ 5:27 pm

Production:

He’s bashing out sparks that soar up like his heart
come again, again
there’s a sword out on the mortar, a silver slicing witchy blade
to take him to war, mercenary boy
the blood running in him that begs for more
the silver sticky red

» Posted By Saudade On 03.08.2015 @ 5:24 pm

Hold ’em tight, squelching in your hands
like yesterday, your boots
carrying her in up that white virgin dress
caught lace all through your fingers
your fingers wound around her, stuck inside her
she’s breathing, breathy
awake with those eyes
that make you kill for another day where
there’s nothing but trees as your canopy witness

» Posted By Saudade On 03.08.2015 @ 5:21 pm

pressing

[Devastated]

You never know, just like they never knew, their eyes that flickered like moths in lighted midnight rooms under Iqaluit winter skies where police stations were freezing boxes and uniforms were golden red like the memories of crimes still backing their eyelids

Their eyes cracked through with hairs of blood like summers in Arkansas when the ground sucked all the life out the air and kept sucking until they lay down parched and begged for water, more than leaked from their shriveled tear ducts

You never know, you just never know, how their hands sunk down and were found their next summer with their frozen wax forms cracked like the August sun.

» Posted By Saudade On 01.07.2015 @ 5:01 pm

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