Comments Posted By Mike the Magic Squid

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Jeff has two bananas and Mike has three apples. If Mike takes Jeff’s bananas, does that make him a thief? If he stole the bananas to feed the less fortunate, does that affect the morality of the situation? The answer, of course, is 42 kg/m*s^2.

» Posted By Mike the Magic Squid On 10.05.2011 @ 4:21 am


Any port in a storm right? Well we’ll see how that turns out. It’s sad; I’ve been waiting for this for months. And now that it’s almost here? I almost don’t want to see you, because the anticipation has been so good.

» Posted By Mike the Magic Squid On 09.23.2011 @ 4:10 am


We’ve got a good exchange going. I give you want you want, you give me what I want. I just need to be sure you won’t find another supplier. I’ve got all this to trade, but if there’s no one to trade with what’s the point? What we need is an emotional trade agreement, with clear exchange rates. Maybe a free trade zone with a willing 3rd party?

» Posted By Mike the Magic Squid On 09.12.2011 @ 1:44 pm


So many types of bars. Steel, aluminum, the ones that are made out of pressure. They can hold you out or keep you in. My favorite bar, though, is the one I’ll visit tonight. The one that helps me get drunk.

» Posted By Mike the Magic Squid On 09.09.2011 @ 4:11 am


If I would have remembered my umbrella, I never would have sold my stuffed octopus to those gypsies.

» Posted By Mike the Magic Squid On 08.25.2011 @ 10:17 am


Sonar Tech Johnson was puzzled by this acoustic signature. It was as if someone was popping popcorn, just underwater. It was jamming a very wide band, and it seemed to be getting louder.

» Posted By Mike the Magic Squid On 04.19.2011 @ 6:45 am


Whiskey you’re the devil, you’re leading me astray. Over hills and mountains and to Amerikay. You’re sweeter, stronger, decenter, you’re spunkier than tea. And whiskey you’re my darling drunk or sober.

And that’s the chorus to “Whiskey You’re the Devil”

» Posted By Mike the Magic Squid On 04.18.2011 @ 9:24 am


What’s severe this morning is my need for caffeine. I don’t know what it is but I can’t seem to get a good night’s sleep, even if I go to bed relatively. Thank God for coffee though.

» Posted By Mike the Magic Squid On 04.14.2011 @ 4:11 am


There are days where everything just seems to go wrong. Obstacles at every turn, when all you want is to go back to bed. When things are bleakest is when you have to push forward. Going on when all you want to do is stop, that’s strength.

» Posted By Mike the Magic Squid On 04.06.2011 @ 8:52 am


Plans always felt to me like hope. I desire for something farther down the road. Built into that is the assumption that things will work out. While plans rarely work out entirely, at least we’re still hoping.

» Posted By Mike the Magic Squid On 04.04.2011 @ 4:38 am


You ever just have things line up for you? So even when things go bad, they end up being a blessing in the end? That’s my life right there. It’s nice, because I feel like I have a greater purpose. Serendipity leading me ever onward.

» Posted By Mike the Magic Squid On 03.31.2011 @ 5:23 pm



» Posted By Mike the Magic Squid On 03.29.2011 @ 4:12 am


If all the world’s a stage, and all the men and women are merely players, then who is our audience?

» Posted By Mike the Magic Squid On 03.28.2011 @ 10:03 am


I’ve read you’re resume, and I must say that it is very interesting. Perhaps the most interesting thing that’s come across my desk all day. However, I don’t think that you’re quite right for the job. Just because you watched all the seasons of “House” in one sitting doesn’t mean you’re a doctor.

» Posted By Mike the Magic Squid On 03.24.2011 @ 4:23 am


It’s all about the approach. Come in to fast and you’ll overshoot. Come in to slow and you’ll crash into the deck. I guess landing on an aircraft carrier is a lot like meeting women?

» Posted By Mike the Magic Squid On 03.23.2011 @ 4:24 am


You can go your entire life without feeling whole. Most try to fill themselves up with stuff. Cars, money, people, used like a psychological duct tape.

» Posted By Mike the Magic Squid On 03.21.2011 @ 4:42 am


Often I’ve wondered why I’m here. And I don’t necessarily mean in a larger metaphysical sense. I mean right where I am today. What decisions made me who I am. If I could do it all again, would I do things differently? Probably, but maybe not.

» Posted By Mike the Magic Squid On 03.10.2011 @ 4:21 am


The words just drips anticipation. So close you can taste it. It’s right there, rolling on in its silent inevitability. Spring break starts Friday, it’s almost here.

» Posted By Mike the Magic Squid On 03.08.2011 @ 6:49 am


“The specific gravity is off; someone has been tampering with the coolant!”
*sirens sound*
“Oh God, the reactor is going critical!”
*sirens stop*
“Or maybe not? Guess it was just a false alarm guys. I’m thinking Denny’s for lunch?”

» Posted By Mike the Magic Squid On 03.03.2011 @ 4:16 am


That’s where you go to push boots. Where chiefs and first-class get saluted. And if you wear khaki then you get red-roped. And out in the fleet that means more than any butter-bar will. It’s where the raw materials get made into the flesh and bone of the service. They call it R-school these days, but who calls it that? It’s basic, and it always will be.

» Posted By Mike the Magic Squid On 03.02.2011 @ 4:43 am


Ah, the bench. It’s one of those mixed things. If you’re on the bench you can just chill out. There’s no pressure to perform, no danger of injury. But the whole time you’re riding the pine you just want to get on the field. Your teammates are out there taking a beating and you’re just sitting there. You are irrelevant, useless. And then you get called, and you’re out there. Maybe you get blown off the line, maybe you’re gasping for breath. But hey, you’re finally off the bench.

» Posted By Mike the Magic Squid On 02.24.2011 @ 3:59 am


I like mine just a little less than ripe. Not really green, but not fully sweet. In my opinion a mango is best when it’s sweetness is tempered with touch of tang.

» Posted By Mike the Magic Squid On 02.23.2011 @ 4:07 am


We all need a release. An outlet from the day to day drudgery that life can be. What’s mine? Books. Books and coffee. A little lame maybe, but I’m happy. I guess that makes me the winner?

» Posted By Mike the Magic Squid On 02.22.2011 @ 8:45 am


It’s almost a miracle really. To make something that had never existed before. That’s the real genius of humanity, the ability to create. Good or bad, we’re always moving ahead.

» Posted By Mike the Magic Squid On 02.18.2011 @ 1:58 pm


There’s something about wool that’s special. It’s thick, warm and even a little water resistant. But it’s also pretty rough. Even the best wool suits are lined with silk. I guess what I’m saying is that balance is important. Also pizza is delicious.

» Posted By Mike the Magic Squid On 02.17.2011 @ 9:14 am


Like the last flight of a falling angel, the white flame arced desperately over our heads. And as is began its slow descent over the barren snow, I couldn’t help but wonder if the others too saw the sad beauty of a dying flame.

» Posted By Mike the Magic Squid On 02.16.2011 @ 9:29 am


Some things just get burned into your mind. For me, it was her fragrance. I don’t think it was anything fancy, just a scented moisturizer she put on every morning. It was like it was everywhere though. I could smell it in the room after she left, on the clothes she left in my car. And now when I smell the same fragrance on another girl, it makes me think of her. Even though I’d rather not.

» Posted By Mike the Magic Squid On 02.09.2011 @ 8:09 am


For some reason I always wake up half an hour before I have to. I set my alarm for 5:35, and I wake up at 5:00. That half hour is one of serious indecision. Should I try and go back to sleep? Should I just get out of bed? And just when I make up my mind, there goes the alarm.

» Posted By Mike the Magic Squid On 02.08.2011 @ 7:41 am


It had gotten to be the only way I could escape. The little tablets of freedom that let me forget the sad reality that was my life. At a certain point though, I began to lose hold of what was real, and what was a dream. So I accepted a new reality, a better reality. And in the end, what’s the difference?

» Posted By Mike the Magic Squid On 02.07.2011 @ 3:53 am


Hey, I don’t feel like writing about a wrench at all. So instead I’m going to pretend today’s word was “wench”. I wonder how wenches used to feel about being called a “wench”? I mean, it was basically a job title right? But then do French waiters feel bad about being called boy? Who knows. I am le tired, so I will take a nap.

» Posted By Mike the Magic Squid On 02.04.2011 @ 4:39 am

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