Comments Posted By Matthew Vanderlaan

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My drinks are never nervous enough to sweat. Maybe I’m just not that threatening to them. I never thought I was that easy going of a guy but not even a beer will break out in cold shivers as I bring it to my lips. Dogs walk all over me and cats regard as though I don’t exist. I never even knew the words please and thank you until I watched an episode of Sesame Street by accident. Courtesy is something I was never informed of.

» Posted By Matthew Vanderlaan On 04.15.2010 @ 11:23 am


The sweet black taste stained his lips and gums. Not the color, but the permeated his mouth and he breathed life into every passing woman. they were taken aback, but the rich exotic, cinnamon, animal scent of him was too much to resist. He screamed once at the sky and ran, naked, through the streets. Your eyes had to follow him. He was like God.

» Posted By Matthew Vanderlaan On 09.02.2009 @ 4:44 pm


My mom never smoked a cigarette in her life. The pictures of bruised and charred lungs she brought home from work helped instill in me the same kind of fear and awe one has for a roll of cancer. They say everything causes cancer now, but I feel like nicotine is still the worst. The Truth ads that came out were one hell of a wake up and I always wished I could be the target of their flash mob tactics.

» Posted By Matthew Vanderlaan On 09.02.2009 @ 10:20 am

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