Comments Posted By Jules Looke
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Maybe it’s shock, or the fact that you’ve been injured so many times before that you’re pretty much impervious to pain, but you don’t feel too bad.
Sure, it hurts. But it’s just a dull ache in your right arm; Right now you’d reckon a paper cut, a stubbed toe or even a step on a lego piece would be much worse than this. Pain wise.
It looks, however, much worse than how it feels.
Your eyes trace the holes where sharp canines had penetrated, tearing in your muscles and flesh. The paper towel you’d be so kindly offered moments ago was now soaked in blood and god knows what else. Well, at least the tetanus shot you got a few months back was worth the trouble.
The female doctor cringes slightly when she -finally- attends to you. It’ll sting a bit, she says as she preps a disinfectant spray. You take her words with a grain of salt -you never trust doctors anyways-and brace yourself.
Sting a bit? is a understatement.
This is unadulterated pain.
» Posted By Jules Looke On 10.21.2012 @ 5:56 pm
You do your usual stretches by the side of the field, stretching your calves, arms, everything, as you try to shake your nerves out of system. As you roll your shoulders back and forth, you ponder why you’re so…jittery, almost nervous, for this. This is nothing new, but you can’t seem to shake the feeling of unease.
After jogging on the spot to get your temperature up -it’s a chilly day today and you’re not particularly pleased. You hate it when it’s chilly- you take a few deep breaths to get your heart rate back to normal.
Damn, your anxiety must be showing clearly if your coach is picking up on it. With a practiced smirk, you respond with your usual snarkiness,
He frowns in response, obviously not convinced but you wave him off before he gets a chance to question you further. You don’t need any forms of badgering right now.
Walking to the starting line, you try your best to clear your very cluttered mind; A hard task considering the amount of noise coming from the very enthusiastic stands and the general mass of runners and their coaches milling around.
“Will all runners be proceed to the starting line. The race will commence shortly.”
You clench and unclench your fists before settling down into the starting position. There are a few moments for you to take a few more deep breaths.
A pistol is shot.
You don’t run.
» Posted By Jules Looke On 10.21.2012 @ 2:41 am
Assembly was hardly your favourite period, but if it involved getting out of class early and sitting in an air-conditioned hall for an hour before the final bell rang, you didn’t mind it at all.
How bad could the weekly sessions of bullshit talks and even crappier performances get? With a decent pair of earpieces, you could snag a nap without anyone noticing.
Except you left yours on the counter top while rushing out this morning. And that today’s assembly session was an award giving ceremony. You’d think that they were giving awards to half the school population, judging by the never ending line of kids waiting to go up on stage.
Your principal blabs on how the kids have done the school proud and to keep up with the good work. You tune her out as you survey her outfit for the day.
You’re not really sure if she has a style, or she just randomly throws on clothes (Expensive clothes, no less) in the morning. Her look is a hot mess, with the exception of her Ferragamo pumps. At least she wastes her salary on at least one thing that looks half-decent on her.
» Posted By Jules Looke On 07.30.2012 @ 9:21 am
The cabinet is beyond stuffed with awards, trophies, scholarships, medals. It even has its own lighting; Making it a makeshift shrine to the accolades received over the years.
Your house never had such a cabinet, your parents never had anything to show off to passing guests what you’ve accomplished in your life (Except maybe that trophy you got when you were in the 4th grade, during Sports’ Day.)
As you stare blankly into the cabinet, poker face in tact when you check your reflection in the glass pane, she proudly recounts how she got that medal, how she got that award, how she was one of few chosen for that scholarship.
You’re sure to keep your mouth shut as she talks, knowing whatever that comes out would be tinged with sarcastic quips and spite. Today, you feel oddly compelled not to burst whatever she has going on today.
That includes her sense of accomplishment.
» Posted By Jules Looke On 07.29.2012 @ 9:36 am
You hate gum.
You hate how the burst of artificial flavorings disappears after a few minutes of chewing, reminding you that what you just chewed on was just flavored plastic.
You hate how it leaves you with a sore jaw and temples when you can’t find the damn wrapper to spit it into and dispose it. You hate the god awful aftertaste it leaves you.
You did love gum, once upon a time, when you were a kid. The bright gumballs that you wasted your spare change on, the hope that one day, someone would’ve invented the everlasting gobstopper.
That was then.
This is now.
You hate gum.
» Posted By Jules Looke On 07.26.2012 @ 9:25 am
You watch her shove a red velvet cupcake into her mouth, her eyes gleaming with almost murderous glee. She sighs happily as she licks the remaining cream cheese icing from her lips and reaches for another cupcake.
She eats it much slowly now, telling you how much she loves red velvet cupcakes and that the icing is one kind of ah-mazing, and that if she could, she’d probably live off red velvet cake between bites.
You hum noncommittally to her ramblings, sipping on your coffee as you do. She hasn’t actually thanked you for making these stupid cupcakes and wasting your time (and money) making that ridiculously hard to perfect icing, but as she reaches for her third cupcake, you don’t mind that she hasn’t.
After all, she did say that icing was one kind of ah-mazing. You could live with that.
» Posted By Jules Looke On 07.23.2012 @ 4:22 am
“You really need to find time to clear this pile of crap.” She’s sitting at your desk, with a cigarette hanging from her mouth. You shrug noncommittally, not bothered to even reply to that. It’s easier said than done; You’ve been trying for years to clear your room, the motivation escapes you as you approach your first hour.
She quietly puffs on her cigarette as you crack open one of the windows. You try not to wonder why she’s even here in your house, in your room, smoking her tar-filled sticks and complaining about the mess.
She should’ve been gone a long time ago.
Instead, you try to focus on how still and (disgustingly) humid the air is tonight and how much you want to take the car out for a ride and drive aimlessly for hours on end til you nearly run out of gas.
You decide that if she’s here to start some semblance of conversation, you wouldn’t give her satisfaction of getting one.
» Posted By Jules Looke On 05.20.2012 @ 7:22 am
You’re pushing hard to just get through the run. Who the hell thought running a couple of kilometers for PE was a good idea? All you wanted right now was to pass out right now; the asphalt seemed like the best thing to lie on right now.
You’re sweating profusely, your heart rates through the roof, you’re struggling just to keep an inhale-exhale flow going. You wipe the beads of sweat (Gross, you were so going to shower for an hour to wash away the grime) before they hit your eyes.
In the distance, you see her leading the class, with large easy strides. She’s doesn’t even look like she’s going to die, in fact she looks like she’s enjoying it. You realize how far you are behind and grimace; It’s going to be a long day.
» Posted By Jules Looke On 03.04.2012 @ 1:13 am
You’d like to think that after college, after finally getting out to the real world, after getting a stable job, you’d come back as an adult that is able to handle things rationally.
You’ve since learnt that Life is a falsification of expectations.
Your return will be no different from when you left.
» Posted By Jules Looke On 12.07.2011 @ 8:09 am
“You deserve the best in the world.”
Except you never did deserve anything. Not because you did anything immoral of sorts, no. You never deserved the best because you’ve never actually done anything to better yourself, anyone, the world.
You live your stagnant and stale life, without changing anything or anyone.
You deserve mediocre, at best.
» Posted By Jules Looke On 12.06.2011 @ 7:16 am
It’s weird, people have told you in the past that you’re a “great listener” but you don’t actually recall feeling that you could relate to them in any way. You always felt so disconnected from most things; You’re an awkward thing.
» Posted By Jules Looke On 10.21.2011 @ 8:02 am
“Gave my heart to the army, the only sentimental thing I could think of.” -The National.
The city’s a warfare for you to get through, though it has practically no guns nor blood pools. Sometimes, you consider yourself as a wuss (and beat yourself up for being ‘weak’) for ever thinking that. Most of the times you agree, with gritted teeth and soldier on.
You just want to sleep. But you wake up just the same.
(Soldier on, kid. Soldier on.)
» Posted By Jules Looke On 10.17.2011 @ 9:17 am
You were never a scout (or a brownie) when you were in primary school. Oddly enough, you joined tennis (Even then, you hit the balls too hard that even the seniors were ducking out of your range).
» Posted By Jules Looke On 10.14.2011 @ 6:51 pm
I have endless stacks of Elementary Math papers to work through. My O level examination for it is in approximately 15 days. 15 days are left to actually study for it.
I am..(Starts with an F, ends with a KED.) ….FIRETRUCKED
» Posted By Jules Looke On 10.11.2011 @ 7:31 am
I didn’t really pay attention during today’s Chemistry lesson on metals. I remember we reviewed how iron reacts with water though, I was too sick to absorb anything. I looked over to your table to see the 6 straight cuts in your arm. You said you got them from a block of wood that you scraped against.
Blood and Iron are related aren’t they?
» Posted By Jules Looke On 10.10.2011 @ 3:28 am
Today, there are strange lines on your arm. Strangely straight lines on your arms. You don’t seem to be worried when I mention this to you, hell you act so blase about it.
The real mystery is how you managed to draw such straight lines with a sharpie on your writing arm.
» Posted By Jules Looke On 10.09.2011 @ 4:16 am
Every February, you do your visiting rounds with your family for Chinese New Year. Everything is red, and if they’re not red, they’re orange at the very most. Chinese believe that red is a sign for prosperity. (You’ve never liked family visiting, neither do your parents parents. But you still go. Chinese have high value for “face” too.)
» Posted By Jules Looke On 10.08.2011 @ 8:16 am
Your parents had always warned you never to cross the road without looking at both sides, never to accept candy from strangers, never to run off without them knowing. But they never did warn you on the brutality of a cut throat world.
» Posted By Jules Looke On 10.06.2011 @ 5:58 am
In your warped perspective of the world, you hold onto stupid beliefs that you, YOU, out of all people, had a sense of morality.
YOU who drank in the corner of bars and fucked most (in their drunken stupor) bothered to talking to you there.
YOU who seemingly fucked up her life and if not for detachment, would’ve have fucked up everyone else as well.
YOU who smoked sticks of tar and nicotine because you thought, maybe in the long run, it would be beneficial for you.
YOU who believes excessively that “sometimes you need to be CRUEL to be KIND”
YOU are CRUEL and NOT KIND. YOU have NO MORALITY.
YOU COMFORT YOURSELF THAT AT LEAST YOU’RE HUMAN.
» Posted By Jules Looke On 10.05.2011 @ 9:26 am
Her eyes are dull now, her hair no longer glistening with the sun. It seems like the band of metal on her hand has transformed her into zombie of sorts. She’s not the girl you knew from before. She would’ve scuffed her sneakers on the worn floor before answering, having a slight blush on her face.
She never did.
“Are you happy?”
» Posted By Jules Looke On 10.04.2011 @ 7:11 am
You took a drag from your cigarette (You wonder why you even bothered picking it up, you hated it when your dad blew smoke into your face when you were younger) The view from your fire escape was stunning, all city lights. All city people. Just bustling about. It always a Friday when you decide to bring out your dusty bottle of Whiskey to consume; To harness that little courage you had to sit on the fire escape. (You never did it sober)
Liquid courage made you forget you were sitting on a potentially dangerous object that would plunge right through if the old screws decided it had enough. You never looked directly down, a little pass the edge, but never down. You were never afraid of heights but no liquor in the world could convince you that you weren’t afraid of falling.
» Posted By Jules Looke On 10.03.2011 @ 3:36 am
She always looked prettiest in braids, though you’ve never told her. Her eyes seems to burn with wild intensity when she did. Like she was ready to take on the evil and badness of the world. She was always braver than you.
» Posted By Jules Looke On 10.01.2011 @ 9:24 pm
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You wish you were romantic; but you never seem to be able to fully comprehend LOVE. To hold on to something and never let go seem too illogical to your brain. So you never held on to anything at all.
» Posted By Jules Looke On 10.01.2011 @ 7:02 am