Comments Posted By Fallon

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I can’t believe Jeff did that! He is so brassy and brazen. It’s no wonder al the girls like him so much. There’s nothing that rock-sacked monkey won’t do. Classical Jeff, man. I sure miss him.

» Posted By Fallon On 01.15.2019 @ 6:03 am


Beans, beans. They make a sphincter sing. Beans, beans, you know what I mean. They’re magical, they’re mystical. They’re musical. Get yours today! Operators are standing by.

» Posted By Fallon On 12.28.2018 @ 6:31 am


“What harm could come of it?”, asked Landon. “Well, how could we even know, really? When an opportunity comes for discovery, you simply have to take calculated risks. And when you’re on the brink of discovery in a new frontier in a place no one has ever been, you can’t calculate risk. Sometimes you have to take that leap of faith in the name of seeking knowledge and sating curiosity, if even just for the briefest moment.”

» Posted By Fallon On 12.18.2018 @ 11:00 am


“Steer the steer toward the gate!”, Jim bellowed. It looked like it was about to break through the fence and go AWOL. We really need this steer to go to market today. It’s been a rough couple of years and we are going to have a tough time staying afloat if we can’t keep things flowing properly and timely.

» Posted By Fallon On 11.26.2018 @ 8:41 am


The only way I get a sequel is if I’m reincarnated. Wait, maybe I’m in my sequel, now. Or maybe I’ve got more sequels than Freddy, Jason, and Sharknado put together. I might really be doing all right. But how’s a fella ta know?

» Posted By Fallon On 08.27.2018 @ 4:10 pm


“Let’s get ready to ruumbbbbblllee,” I heard from a distance. The rumbling of what seemed to be thousands of boots against hard, dusty clay, accompanied by that all-too-familiar war cry, made me wonder what in the world could be coming my way.

» Posted By Fallon On 08.20.2018 @ 1:28 pm


Everything’s in recession right now, especially my hairline. It’s as if it’s afraid of my eyes and/or nose. Or maybe there’s some unwritten facial hair law that says crazy scientist eyebrows and hairlines need to be separated by as far a gap as possible. And my brows aren’t going anywhere…

» Posted By Fallon On 08.19.2018 @ 8:18 pm


Have mercy! Elvis has left the building. I always wonder which exit he goes out. It must be a super secret exit. By the very nature of needing an announcement for us to know that he’s no longer in the building with us, there must have been a great place for him to have snuck away, unobserved.

» Posted By Fallon On 05.29.2017 @ 11:26 am


Prisoner to the page. I’m asked to write. And to write without aim or qualification. I’m told it will set me and my writing and creativity free. Maybe they need not be freed. No one will know what I don’t tell. Maybe I’m the one who least wants to know what I really think.

» Posted By Fallon On 10.05.2015 @ 8:21 pm


I have to take a medical leave. It’s not the job, it’s not, really, it’s just…I don’t feel well. Something’s wrong with me and I don’t know what it is, but if I don’t take care of it now I’m afraid it’s just going to keep getting worse. It won’t be long, just a week or two, but it’s just…something I need to do.

» Posted By Fallon On 09.21.2015 @ 8:54 pm


Wintertime is the best, there’s snow and holidays and cold and fun things. Fun things like hot chocolate and snowball fights and fireplaces and snuggling. Wintertime means that the air smells really clean and crisp and even hurts a little. I love how it’s a reboot for mother nature, covering everything in snow so that it can “die” for a season.

» Posted By Fallon On 12.22.2014 @ 6:28 am


The stale bread tasted better than anything she had ever eaten. After weeks of walking from the wreckage, she finally managed to find a town, a place to stay, and some food. She had no money and her fiance was dead or missing or whatever, but at least she had herself and no injuries to speak of.

» Posted By Fallon On 12.19.2014 @ 6:45 am


As far as she could see, there was ocean. Beyond that, nothing. She was stranded on this island where the nights were cold with lots of bugs and the days were hot with blinding sand and nothing but ocean. She was terrified and there was nothing she could do to get rescued.

» Posted By Fallon On 12.17.2014 @ 8:13 am


He was falsifying his arms around like crazy. She simply stood to the side staring at him in amazement. She was stupefied to watch someone make such an absolute fool of himself. But there was something about the odd smile on his face as he danced around the lot in his underwear that reminded her why she loved him.

» Posted By Fallon On 02.18.2013 @ 7:40 pm


The arts are a way of true expression, via words or almost any other medium. you can paint, you can draw, you even just sing, but I think you’ll find them most satisfying. Remember, just try – you can do anything you put your mind to and be as creative as you want to. Go! Live.

» Posted By Fallon On 11.13.2012 @ 6:22 pm


The idle chat of the dull bleached white room seems so stiff and formal. I shift in my seat, unsure how to contribute to the conversation. I smile when they smile, nod when they do, and try my best to blend in. So why do I feel like they’re staring at me, as if I’m still an outsider?

» Posted By Fallon On 06.09.2012 @ 9:49 am


When I do wear makeup I have to wear eyeliner, most of the time. Even when I don’t wear makeup I wear eyeliner. I think that without it my eyes look weird, kind of like an alien’s. But I also love the freedom I have when holding an eyeliner pencil or liquid eyeliner brush in my hand… I can create just about any look I desire. Do I want to have the eyes of a mystical cat today? An Ancient Egyptian pharaoh? A broken emo girl?

» Posted By Fallon On 05.05.2011 @ 2:51 pm


Fluorescent lighting makes me look dark. It does not capture my good side. Not that there’s anything wrong with darkness, it can be romantic. But this time it’s heinous. It’s one of the things that reminds me I can be so vain […]

» Posted By Fallon On 05.02.2011 @ 7:19 am

The fluorescent lights do not capture my good side. They make me look dark. Not that there’s anything wrong with darkness, it can be romantic. But this time it’s heinous.

» Posted By Fallon On 05.02.2011 @ 7:13 am


I have tables in my house, tables in my classroom. I just can’t seem to get rid of them. They are the price I pay for letting my Aunt Rita live with me for the year. Her husband just died, and she was lonely all the way out in Arizona, so I let her come live up here with me in New York.

» Posted By Fallon On 02.25.2011 @ 7:03 pm

i saw him sitting at the tables, and all I could think was woah. Hes so. Different. Perfect? I sat there. I could tell I was becoming awkward, but I couldnt help myself. He was just so eye catching. Finally, the hostess asked me if I would like to take a seat, and guided me toward the table across from him.

» Posted By Fallon On 02.25.2011 @ 4:31 pm


Sticking my finger in an electrical outlet may very well give my nearly brain-dead brain the very boost it needs to be able to give vent to my now-withered and sorely-missed creative outlet. A sort of recharge, if you will. Or, even if you won’t.

» Posted By Fallon On 02.21.2011 @ 8:14 pm


the ocean ends where it begins, or some can say, began. i’m terrified of the ocean, she said, just terrified. why didn’t daddy ever come home? who will i love? what will it all matter about in the future? it won’t. existence is endless and we can’t do anything about it. and we can’t do anything about it.

» Posted By fallon On 01.21.2011 @ 5:50 pm


Her hair shone the color of copper, and he was entranced from the moment he saw her. Her green eyes bright and her rosy lips plump, he thought she must be the most perfect woman he had ever seen.

» Posted By Fallon On 11.29.2010 @ 4:22 pm


Flanel #5. It’s my favorite, fashionable new parfum. It’s the latest scent from New York’s premiere eau de toilette magnate, Pierre du Cardin de Va Grinchy. It will be hitting retail shelves soon.

» Posted By Fallon On 10.12.2010 @ 6:06 pm


I can’t do this anymore. My pride has seen me fall too many times. The shadows grow long like my beard. Time has come and time has passed. If I can’t figure out how to help myself I will turn to you.

» Posted By Fallon On 09.23.2010 @ 1:56 pm


Kangaroos! Dipping chewing tobacco! Carrying a fannypack! With a wineskin and coinpurse!

» Posted By Fallon On 09.14.2010 @ 12:35 am


Trees. And more trees. I love them. They’re not too cuddly. They’re like an iguana for a pet. They’re cool and all, but you can’t snuggle up close and fluff one’s hair. Worst. Post. Ever. Hey, they can’t all be winners, right?

» Posted By Fallon On 08.31.2010 @ 7:39 pm


Your cheek against my hand, as you almost cry in both joy and sorrow – it may have been the single most moving moment of my life. I love you so very much and can’t wait to continue spending every waking moment of the rest of my life with you.

» Posted By Fallon On 08.30.2010 @ 9:48 pm


I’ll loft this thing into the air. Paragliding has been an endeavor for a while now and when we get the Delorian to precisely 88 miles per hour, some majorly crazy shit is going to happen. We’re taking this glider back to the future!

» Posted By Fallon On 08.29.2010 @ 3:39 pm

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