Comments Posted By Fair Enough
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It is jarring to be told just how harmful you are to someone. Especially someone that you would never want to harm. Realizing that the more you fall in love with them the more you harm them, and then all at once realizing that the fire inside you that burned for them had actually been literally burning them and the only thing they want is for you stop hurting them.
Even more jarring is realizing that the fire you thought they had burning for you in return was actually a candle, and all the warmth you felt around them was actually coming from you instead of from them.
If you truly care for them what should you do? Let the fire continue to grow, or drown the fire in the tears you shed letting them go?
I wish she could understand how much of me she has consumed without realizing it, and at least appreciate at the end that it was my warmth that kept us comfortable in our relationship and not hers. I just never meant to hurt her so much. My body only feels cold now, as I desperately try to stamp out a fire that has raged for so long.
» Posted By Fair Enough On 12.18.2018 @ 12:58 pm
“This is espresso. This is like coffeezilla.” he said to the three year old asking for cup of coffee like his.
» Posted By Fair Enough On 12.11.2018 @ 7:54 am
On any given day, sorting through my thoughts and feelings feels like scouring a dry and dusty desert for water to keep me alive. My brain feels starved and thirsty for something, anything that can keep it going. Keep it marching towards the ocean where it can finally relax.
The medicine is like my oasis in the desert. I find it every day, just in time to save me from roaming aimlessly into thoughts and feelings that it might be better for me to avoid. However, sometimes it feels good, even wonderful to roam the desert freely, falling in to whatever mishap or encounter that comes my way.
I even found beautiful flower out there once, but the flower did not need me or the oasis to survive. It could survive just fine on its own. I wanted to pluck it and bring it with me, but that would have destroyed everything that I loved about it. Eventually I had to flee from that place knowing good and well that I would probably never find that place or place like it again.
There on the horizon I see my oasis again, with the sun rising behind it and reflecting off of the tiny pool of life saving water. I love it here.
» Posted By Fair Enough On 12.04.2018 @ 6:34 am
If these floorboards could talk, they would still just creak and crack and bounce with your movement anyway. They have spent decades underneath your feet and they are tired of all the crap that you track in and all over them. All our feet do is get bigger and heavier and the floorboards are tired of holding us up as we stomp around like apes. So, in their old age they protest each and every one of our steps, reminding us that without them there wouldn’t even be a damn floor to get dirt on.
» Posted By Fair Enough On 12.03.2018 @ 10:48 am
If these floorboards could talk, they would still just creak and crack and bounce with your movement anyway. They have spent decades underneath your feet and they are tired of all the crap that you track in and across them. All our feet do is get bigger and heavier and the floorboards are tired of holding you up. So in their old age they protest each and every one of your steps, reminding you that without them there wouldn’t even be a damn floor to get dirt on.
» Posted By Fair Enough On 12.03.2018 @ 10:46 am
If she were a country, I imagine she would be an island somewhere in the Mediterranean. A beautiful place that I would dream of taking a tour of.
» Posted By Fair Enough On 11.28.2018 @ 1:40 pm
He looked great in a suit, and he knew how to style himself in a such a way that made him look much more affluent than he actually was. As he sat down at a table with the group of otherwise wealthy and upper class attendees he only hoped that nobody would notice that he had never been taught the proper order of silverware to use, or what the difference between a salad fork and a regular fork was.
» Posted By Fair Enough On 11.20.2018 @ 12:48 pm
She hadn’t missed him. She hit him dead center. He was not allowed to let anyone, least of all her, know he had been hit though; or that the wound was as grave as it was. The wound was so deep that he thought it might kill him. He wanted someone, anyone in the world to understand his pain and without judging him for allowing himself to be wounded in this way.
She had shot him through the heart, and he could only sit there and bleed out as he realized there was no one to save him and no one to blame but himself.
» Posted By Fair Enough On 11.13.2018 @ 3:04 pm
I used to be very flexible. I could contort my arms into crazy positions, but I as I got older I also gained a lot of mass and even though I am a lot stronger now I have not been able to maintain the level of flexibility that I used to have when I was in high school.
» Posted By Fair Enough On 11.12.2018 @ 12:23 pm
You’re still being disagreeable forcing me to jump through hoops just to get more than two words out of you. I think that you like to talk just a little bit more than I like to listen though. So perhaps this is simply a waiting game.
» Posted By Fair Enough On 10.23.2018 @ 11:38 am
As you get older it becomes more and more irresponsible to fixate on your own respective level of purity. Purity is often traded for knowledge and wisdom, and as we grow in knowledge and intellect our naivety fades away and we see the world around and ourselves in a much more accurate light. That is why children are seen as pure, they have a fresh and untainted view of the world, they see the world as we wish it could be.
However, the world is dangerous, and people are dangerous and to choose not to acknowledge those aspects of the human condition is irresponsible.
» Posted By Fair Enough On 10.12.2018 @ 2:24 pm
She was the toughest person to talk with about what he thought about her. She was able to absorb his words and thoughts so effortlessly and she seemed so impervious to them. On the best of days he might get a quick glance or a grin from her, but most days it was simply an emoji or an affirmation that she was flattered or appreciative.
He hoped that one day she might finally explode with all of things he hoped she was just choosing not to do or say, like he would turn around one day in the gym or parking lot and she would be standing right there ready to tell him everything.
» Posted By Fair Enough On 10.02.2018 @ 2:27 pm
A plot is important, but what matters more is the tone of the story. The plot is simply the statement of the events in an order and fashion that best suits the telling of the story. The tone however establishes how you meant to feel. A great plot means nothing if the events laid out therein do not carry any weight for you. Million Dollar Baby had a simple plot, but a very uplifting tone, and that made the ending all the more sad when the tone turned so dark and sad.
» Posted By Fair Enough On 09.25.2018 @ 9:54 am
Ever step back and wonder what it would be like to accidentally meet someone you know at a market. Someone you only know in only within a particular context, like coworker or classmate. People are always different when you find them outside the elements in which they have built the image you have of them.
Sometimes I wonder if I ever bumped into a certain someone at one point in my past and never even realized. At a market perhaps.
» Posted By Fair Enough On 09.24.2018 @ 2:22 pm
Should logic always dictate your actions? Some would argue yes and some would argue no. I think it comes down to what is most important to you. If you crave the destination then let logic be your guide. If the journey is what matters most then ignore what you should logically do. You can take the freeway and get there, or you can take the scenic route and if you’re lucky maybe you will even get a little lost.
» Posted By Fair Enough On 09.20.2018 @ 9:29 am
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It was surreal to finally not just understand what she must have been going through when we met, but to experience it for myself. When she first told me about her state mind at the time I understood what she meant, but I did not understand how it felt.
I had imagined the lack of fear and the perpetual numbness to at least be liberating to a certain degree. To give the sensation that any decision was as equally inconsequential as the next, but now I know for myself. The desire to just close my eyes, let go of the handlebars and let the road send me where it wants too, even that means flying into a ravine. Anything to be free from the path I put myself on without truly looking ahead.
It isn’t liberating though, it is a dark and lonely experience, and one that I am all too aware puts more than just me at risk. Even as I write this I know that I am not emotionally capable of restraint. I would sooner burn my life to the ground than live another moment in the bed I have made for myself. I have no idea what it will take to fix me, but I have to find out soon.
» Posted By Fair Enough On 09.19.2018 @ 9:07 am