Comments Posted By Belinda Roddie

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espresso

Are you feeling like a cup of tea? How about espresso? There’s nothing like a caffeine kick to make you feel just so-so. Just sip the brew and sing the blues and don’t worry about Nancy. She’s off with Sean and Joe and Bess and trying to be fancy. I’ll pour you a tall mug of java, make it a bit stronger, so your heart can beat a bit faster, last a little longer.

» Posted By Belinda Roddie On 12.09.2018 @ 2:02 pm

builders

We were builders once – constructing an empire out of mere shadows, which, once they collected lights, became monoliths of their own reckoning. We forged alliances with angels who wore celestial swords like talons on their hips, and so we crashed upon the chasm of Hell with chariots raging with fire. But then we were dismantled; piece by piece, we were segmented and relocated, and now the deconstruction is complete, and the realm is riddled with never-ending holes.

» Posted By Belinda Roddie On 12.07.2018 @ 8:49 pm

related

“Hey, you two look like you could be twins! Are you two related?”

I force a smile and lean my back against the cold glass of the bus stop, while my friend Jessie keeps looking at her phone. It’s true that we could be mistaken for cousins or even siblings, but twins? That just seems a bit too much.

» Posted By Belinda Roddie On 12.06.2018 @ 10:19 am

fun

They told me it would be easy. They told me it would be fun. They told me I had the support I needed and I’d definitely get this done.

They lied to me – it was nightmarish. They lied to me – it was Hell. They lied so harshly through their teeth that it sounded like whistling bells.

Their words will never comfort me; they do not meant a thing. And before everything goes mad, I plan on escaping.

» Posted By Belinda Roddie On 12.04.2018 @ 6:52 pm

oasis

I stopped by Paul’s Crimson Oasis for a tall glass of black coffee. He told me all they had was water, and suddenly, I really was in a desert of my feelings. Still, a little lemon and licorice was enough to make even H2O pleasing, and I hopped back in my T-Bird with a full thermos and practically pedaled my way to Ferris’s Foyer for a glass of sherry and an espresso.

» Posted By Belinda Roddie On 12.03.2018 @ 8:55 pm

floorboards

I knew that he was alive somewhere. Alive, heart still beating, intact – not in pieces like that blasted “Tell-Tale Heart” by Poe. Still, if I had to be like that denying mad protagonist, I would be. I’d rip up the floorboards myself, stretch the skin along my cuticles, rip out the nails and keratin that were my only bridges to sanity.

» Posted By Belinda Roddie On 12.02.2018 @ 10:25 pm

iceberg

Everyone started freaking out when the “new Titanic” was being built, but frankly, given the trends of climate change, I don’t see it hitting an iceberg any time soon. Because…you know…the icebergs are melting. So it’ll be pretty smooth sailing.

I’ve always been fascinated by boats, so this news was definitely up my alley. Perhaps I’ll sneak my way onto the vessel if it ever gets finalized.

» Posted By Belinda Roddie On 12.01.2018 @ 9:57 pm

barrier

I feel as if an invisible barrier holds me back from the treasure chest. I can almost smell the pine of the wood, catch a glimpse of gold beneath its heavy lid. I want to hear it creak open so badly. But my palms are flat against glass I can’t see, and the reward I desperately desire just sits there, taunting me.

If only I had a sword or an axe or a chainsaw. But then again, I think this is all impervious to physical weapons.

» Posted By Belinda Roddie On 11.30.2018 @ 5:26 pm

wired

I never drink coffee, but at night, I’m wired. I hate afternoons ’cause I’m always tired. I manage a store where the best are hired, with the wife and the little baby boy I sired. Now time to eat my tiramisu – I like the coffee flavor, just not the coffee brew.

» Posted By Belinda Roddie On 11.29.2018 @ 8:17 pm

tour

We went for a bike ride around my old university campus and took a tour of downtown, where I could see that the Rustic Coffee Stop had been replaced by a quaint, purple-tinged cupcake shop, and the diner where I also got a grilled cheese and tomato soup had been remodeled and was now serving way more customers. We stopped for a drink of water, our foreheads warm and wet with perspiration, and my friend turned my attention to the nearest street corner.

» Posted By Belinda Roddie On 11.28.2018 @ 6:30 pm

corners

I didn’t like the way she handled her new job. In truth, she had never deserved to get promoted, especially not over me. She ignored important tasks, disrupted our work flow, and cut corners all the time. And when we called her out on it, she’d turn into a maelstrom of denial and rage.

“I am the boss here!” she shrieked one day when I so much as questioned her on a slew of typos in a quarterly report write-up. “I am the boss! And don’t you forget it!”

That night, I checked on the Internet to see if I could murder my superior for being a toxic waste of space.

» Posted By Belinda Roddie On 11.27.2018 @ 12:41 pm

steer

Joseph tried to steer the boat, but Joseph had no sense of direction. So Joseph wound up sailing us east instead of obviously going west. I guess Joseph had no real sense of direction or knew where exactly the sun set. So we wound up sitting on an island eating raw crab, because Joseph was inept at everything, including managing a vessel on the ocean.

Oh, well. At least Joseph was handsome. And very effective at sexy times in a makeshift hammock.

» Posted By Belinda Roddie On 11.24.2018 @ 10:39 pm

probably

In retrospect, I know that I probably shouldn’t have done any of the things I did over those crazy five years. I probably shouldn’t have said the things I said, kissed the people I kissed, believed the things I believed. I know that. I’m just…not sure how to handle the fall-out. Or figure out how I can move forward.

But I’m here. And I have a job and an apartment. And I own a super awesome cat said Rodrigo. So I can’t complain, really.

» Posted By Belinda Roddie On 11.23.2018 @ 8:14 pm

hailstorm

Luckily, as we were driving up the mountain, none of the hell stories told about the weather came into fruition. There was no heavy rain. There was no hailstorm. There was no blizzard or flurry or even one speck of snow. Sure, it was cold, but I enjoyed that. I enjoyed seeing my breath float in front of me like a new, ghostly friend. I enjoyed the look of the cabin we stayed at – like something out of a fairy tale, or a picture book from the 1800s.

» Posted By Belinda Roddie On 11.20.2018 @ 7:18 pm

silverware

When my in-laws came over for dinner, we brought out the fine china and the nice silverware. We got the rose-bedecked tablecloth and lit candles and did all the cheesy stuff you’re supposed to do to “impress” anybody. When my wife told me what the menu was, however, I nearly had a heart attack.

“TURKEY BURGERS?”

She blinked. “My dad loves them. And don’t worry – they’re FANCY turkey burgers.”

» Posted By Belinda Roddie On 11.19.2018 @ 1:22 pm

denied

I tried to get into the university I wanted, but I was denied without so much as a second glance. I knew it was a long shot – the graduate program that the school offered appeared only to have room for the best of the best, the crème de la crème – and I happened to be the equivalent of skim milk when they were looking for custard. I was ready to give up on a master’s degree entirely.

» Posted By Belinda Roddie On 11.17.2018 @ 9:55 pm

bedside

Frankie stayed at my bedside the entire time I was ill, holding my clammy hand and singing to me as I faded in and out of consciousness. I had strange dreams, mostly consisting of abstract shapes and bubbles that carried me to a shoddily drawn house on a crayon landscape. It was as if my mind had been melted like wax, and the last memories I had were of things I had created as a small child in art class.

» Posted By Belinda Roddie On 11.16.2018 @ 8:50 pm

broke

“Want to share a milkshake today?” asked Lacey, as we huddled together under the elm tree just outside school.

I shook my head. “Sorry,” I sighed. “I’m broke. I can’t even afford a cookie from that shop right now.”

“Okay,” said Lacey, smiling. “My treat, then.”

I tried to protest, but she squeezed my hand in defiance.

» Posted By Belinda Roddie On 11.15.2018 @ 8:13 am

missed

I think I should have missed school, but I didn’t. I sank down into my personal oblivion before nine AM, and I tried to write my in-class essay, but I couldn’t get any English out. It was like I knew no languages, understood no dialects or even single words. When I fell asleep in math class, I dreamed of chaos spun like sugar into stars. I can’t really describe it in any other way – fever dreams are just sort of like that.

» Posted By Belinda Roddie On 11.13.2018 @ 4:22 pm

flex

Watch me fly, you non-believers – my wings will flex and ripple like the arms of the sun above my head. I will touch each cloud and wash my sins away in the suspended water. I will descend to the oceans below and let my fingers dance across the foam. Then, I will perch atop the highest mountain, where it is cold and my breathing is shallow. And I will watch the world as its only pure observer.

» Posted By Belinda Roddie On 11.11.2018 @ 4:21 pm

nightlight

Samantha didn’t need the nightlight on after she turned nine years old, but somehow, I always think she was somewhat afraid of the dark. She didn’t leave her room much when the sun had set, even when she was a teenager. If she hung out with friends, it was in the afternoon or inside, where the lamps were bright and the whole house hummed with glowing activity.

» Posted By Belinda Roddie On 11.09.2018 @ 1:01 pm

motel

“How would I have to do,” you asked, “to get a make-out sessions with you at the Sixty Shades Motel near my house?”

“Find a better hotel,” I grinned.

You laughed at that, pouring me another glass of cheap red wine. All things considered, it tasted better than the fancier stuff I had tasted with my parents the day before. We were eating sirloin steak – good sirloin. With barbecue sauce.

» Posted By Belinda Roddie On 11.07.2018 @ 4:01 pm

ambassador

I’d love to stay in Ireland – maybe they could make me an ambassador there. I’d wear freshly pressed suits and pretend I understood Gaelic. I’d learn all the old songs and play the fiddle or the uilleann pipes. I’d drink a pint or two of thirteen as soon as the sun began to set. And then I’d finally listen to everybody’s stories – how they got here, where they’d like to do, and how they’d like to shake the paralysis from their heavy limbs.

» Posted By Belinda Roddie On 11.05.2018 @ 10:03 pm

cappuccino

She ordered a shaken ice chai, and I ordered a cappuccino. Didn’t matter that I hated coffee; didn’t matter that the taste made my tongue wince and my teeth grow another inch in agony. I just sipped away and watched as her tea slowly disappeared through her straw, a muddy river zipping to her lips and disappearing as if down a vast, unending gorge.

We knew it had to end some day. I just didn’t know it’d end at a sh***y café in downtown Los Angeles, six years later.

» Posted By Belinda Roddie On 11.04.2018 @ 10:04 am

skyline

Somehow, I don’t find nuance anymore in the green seaweed hue of a microshore, or the orange skyline above my head, or any of the secondary colors that remind me of all my basic, primary components. You drape me in purple, but I don’t feel like royalty; I just feel overdressed. I’d rather sit in the rain outside on a day devoid of color, where everyone’s shadows blend together, and the dark gray mess holds stars behind its allegedly lifeless eyes.

» Posted By Belinda Roddie On 11.02.2018 @ 10:36 pm

direct

It’s finally November, so I want to be direct with you: I don’t want to come see your in-laws for Thanksgiving. I know that might frustrate you just a little bit, but I’m tired of seeing your mother’s red “MAGA” hat, and I hate listening to hearing your father chew loudly with his mouth open. And for the love of God, don’t even get me started on your sister, who’s decided that she needs to scream at the TV every time the Pikachu float shows up during the Macy’s parade.

» Posted By Belinda Roddie On 11.01.2018 @ 8:31 pm

wrong

Someone told me that candy corn was better than chocolate, and that is just wrong, you know? Like, hit the hammer with the nail, pour milk in before the cereal, deliver the mail to the mailman wrong. I mean, I dunno what sort of trick or treating nightmare escapades some folks have been on, but I’ll take chocolate peanut butter, chocolate caramel, chocolate nuts, chocolate and anything over some pseudo-candy wax cones.

» Posted By Belinda Roddie On 10.31.2018 @ 1:56 pm

cost

You order a hamburger at the Eat ‘n Flee Diner to the west of campus, and you sit down to find that it’s bloody rare instead of medium well done. How much will it cost? Nothing, hopefully. You return the meal to the waiter, only to see her eyes spin to the back of her head. “I am the cow goddess,” she moans. “I reject your rejected gift.”

» Posted By Belinda Roddie On 10.23.2018 @ 10:07 pm

majority

The majority doesn’t want this kind of government, or this kind of economic treatment, or these kinds of representatives. Why, then, do they refuse to vote? Why, then, do they find their voices muted, or their priorities shifted, or their opinions irrelevant?

Look around you – hundreds of thousands of voters disenfranchised. Suppressed, unregistered, removed from polling places. They will take your rights away if you do not use them.

October 22nd in California. Register to vote.

» Posted By Belinda Roddie On 10.21.2018 @ 9:53 pm

bell

Please turn in your paperwork. Please wait for the bell. Please pretend this gray campus isn’t the gateway to a modern Hell. Please remember to study for the test you’ll never remember. Then pray that you’ll at least survive the very first semester. Perhaps you’ll find some newfound cheer when we finally reach December. Then you can burn your final exam and spit upon the embers.

» Posted By Belinda Roddie On 10.20.2018 @ 10:44 am

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