Comments Posted By Alyssa

Displaying 1 To 30 Of 648 Comments

version

I dream of a version of my current life, where i’m open to love and patient with others.

» Posted By Alyssa On 11.17.2017 @ 7:03 am

informed

I was Informed of the cuts. But most importantly I was informed of my sadness. I was worried about her. I was informed of her. But what or who am I to say something.

» Posted By alyssa On 10.11.2017 @ 1:32 pm

i was informed f the cuts, I was more informed of my sadness. but what do i do that’s one thing i wasnt informed of

» Posted By alyssa On 10.11.2017 @ 1:28 pm

staggering

John was staggering across the field. His shoes squelched with mud, and his pants were filthy with green stains. Grass and blood. He clenched his jaw. Then his heart with that mighty, meaty, trembling fist and, after several long seconds, he fell. His body lay hidden by the stalks of wheat. His eyes were as glassy as the worm’s, which crawled across his chest and nestled into his breast pocket, beneath his medallion. Under this starless sky, John died.

» Posted By alyssa On 09.28.2017 @ 7:00 am

cement

Cement. My feet are planted into the cement. Like a rose. I grow out of the concrete. I grow. I grow. I learn. I expand. Like a bubble. I spread my wings and fly. I spread. I am a mess. I am chaos. I am the stars and the moon. I swallow. I swallow your lies. I eat. I ingest. I digest. I swirl between faith and doubt. My feet are planted into the cement. I break free of the stone. I break. I crack open. I melt. I am open. And its hard to remain pure. When I feel everyone. Since I was a little girl, I always felt so much. I cry watching the tv. Watching the news. I cry. I breakdown. I am a raw woman in a disguse of fuck you’s and paint. Pink paint on my toes. My hair in curlers. I am a raw. I am raw. My flesh holds secrets. I am not perfect and I have tried to be perfect my whole life. The way I wrote. The way I held my pen. I always wished I had blonde hair and blue eyes. The boys would tell me I was too skinny. The girls would not invite me to their bench for lunch. “You’re not welcome here,” she said. Her name was Vanessa. She had long brown hair and long eyelashes. She smacked her gum when she chewed. Her uniform skirt was shorter than it was supposed to be. I could feel the heat of the sun burn into my arms as I held my lunch tray. We stared at each other in the outdoor lunch area. Kids laughing. All I could feel was the weight of not belonging. I was discarded like the crumpled brown lunch bags on the floor. I nodded my head, and walked towards the empty table. I never felt so alone. And desperate. I was desperate for connection. I am desperate. I crave connection. I’m hungry. I need. I need to know that my life means something. I assign myself the meaning. Or maybe it’s given to me and I don’t understand it’s code. The many layers of an onion. And I as I cut into the onion I cry. Maybe that’s what it so painful to go and reveal the many layers the cover my core. Fuck. I cut. I dig. I burn. I reach. I reach for my mom when I’m scared, but she’s not here anymore. Only a ghost. I long to press my fingertips against hers. I long. I yearn. I beg. I bang. I talk loud. I want to be heard. I want flow. I want dignity. I want dignity. I want to be respected for just being human. I have bowed my head too long. It’s one thing to be humble, it’s other to disregard myself. To make myself small. To confine myself into a box. A cardbox box. A black box. Funeral. Death. I don’t want to die small. I don’t want anything from anybody anymore. I just want to be okay with me. And that is okay to spill and be messy. That it is okay to make mistakes. To color outside the fucken lines. To wear pink and yellow and red and blue and polka dots. I am so tired of fucken rules. I am so tired. I am. I am. That’s it. I am here. I am now. And each moment is a miracle. So many things have to collide and take place to sustain this life I am breathing through. Plants yearn for the sun. They yearn for water. Nutrition. I yearn for a hug. A truthful connection. “And maybe” she said. “Perfume.” She held the perfume bottle out to me. The glass bottle fit into the palm of my hand. Sarah had soft skin, red cheeks, and blue eyes. She was hopeful and full of mystery. Her red dress did not match her face. It was past midnight. I felt dizzy from dancing. The sounds of the Brooklyn rave still echoing in my ears. We were in her cheap and bare apartment on 1st ave and 12th street. “I don’t wear perfume, I like my stink.” I said. She smiled. I cried. She held me tight. I could barely breath, but at least I felt free.

» Posted By Alyssa On 08.04.2017 @ 11:36 am

amplified

the sound amplified throughout the room. it was like it was only me in the whole world. as i sunk into my chair i closed my eyes and thought about nothing. my mind was blank.

» Posted By Alyssa On 07.18.2017 @ 1:29 pm

circular

Round and round I got into the sky like the moon what a ballon yellow purple stars I remember when I five and I believed magic and Satna clause exited And then my dad told me when I was eight that the easter bunny wasn’t real. I remember my mom was pissed. We go full circle like the cycles. Spring winter fall. WE fall. We fall.

» Posted By Alyssa On 04.18.2017 @ 7:00 pm

ingredients

She couldn’t believe what she was seeing. Her best friend was trying and not succeeding at making them breakfast. Her friend was a terrible cook and more often than not her food would be inedible.

» Posted By Alyssa On 03.14.2017 @ 5:18 pm

moth

A moth is a creepy bug that flies around and is very annoying. It’s usually brown ad gross looking. A moth is just an irreverent bug that gets in the way and scares children. They also usually fly around really crazy, almost like they are blind. i do nt like moths.

» Posted By alyssa On 03.07.2017 @ 7:59 am

tricked

yo okay so once i got tricked my my brother. I was going down to the basment, and our basement is really creepy. he popped out of no where and scared the crap out of me. I was super scary.

» Posted By Alyssa On 02.02.2017 @ 10:43 am

parking

The parking garage was dimly lit and empty. Obviously, any sane person would have looked at it and turned around. But she didn’t. She couldn’t. So she pulled her jacket tight, took a deep breath set out at a quick clip.

» Posted By Alyssa On 09.18.2016 @ 1:18 pm

grounded

grounded makes me think of being in trouble for something as a kid. it could also mean not being conceited or full of yourself. you’re able to place your feel firmly on the ground and remember who you are and where you are from. it’s a positive thing.

» Posted By Alyssa On 08.27.2016 @ 10:44 pm

painter

Soft, delicated brushstrokes draped all over the canvas. It wasn’t the artist’s best work; but he loved it all the same. It was HIS, a unique creation that he himself had made.

» Posted By Alyssa On 08.24.2016 @ 6:17 am

darkness

It is the opposite of light. Mostly used in a negative connotation, but I find darkness comforting. It can shield you. Whereas with light everything is exposed, darkness can wrap itself around you like a warm, protective blanket. Darkness is safety.

» Posted By Alyssa On 06.10.2016 @ 8:43 am

solar

Solar panels seem to be ideal for the common upper middle class American. I think it’s great because when the zombie apocalypse comes we’ll all be straight and have energy as long as the sun is shining.

» Posted By Alyssa On 04.22.2016 @ 12:26 pm

Solar beam is my favorite move that venasaur does. It’s a two move. First one Venasaur absorbs light, and then the second move Venasaur blasts his opponent. It’s siiick.

» Posted By Alyssa On 04.21.2016 @ 5:52 pm

buddha

Peace, love, positivity, good vibes, deep thoughts, existence, enlightenment, good deeds, self indulgence.

» Posted By Alyssa On 04.19.2016 @ 11:22 pm

bullets

My dad likes bullets…he likes guns. He makes stuff with bullets or he also uses them as a keychain. He knows every kind of bullet possible. He always knows exactly what kid they are. He’s smart when it comes to guns and bullets.

» Posted By Alyssa On 04.04.2016 @ 2:35 pm

sublime

The way she held my hand was a feeling I never felt before. The way her fingers locked with mine, and the softness of her thumb above my palm. There was nothing else in the world like it. Fresh cotton could compare, but I’d never get this feeling from clean laundry.

» Posted By Alyssa On 12.09.2015 @ 5:40 pm

channel

it means 1. I love my channel on Pandora. or there is a channel on tv and you want to watch it

» Posted By alyssa On 12.07.2015 @ 7:43 am

projector

Projector. I don’t even know what to say about this word. Mind blank right? Projectors were used in my school for watching teachers take notes. They were mainly used in math class. I really fucking hate math class. I’m not good at it at all. Projecting what my future will look like in a year? I project that I will be living here still with Nick. Hopefully I’ll be on my way to my esthetician license.

» Posted By Alyssa On 04.16.2015 @ 9:07 pm

production

Production: be productive…be on top of the world.

» Posted By Alyssa On 03.07.2015 @ 12:33 am

centerpiece

The huge centerpiece crashed into the floor when Joey flipped the table out of anger. He didn’t know how to control himself when Amy told him she had slept with John. He felt the rage build up in his body, his face felt hot and he knew he was going to do something he would regret if he couldn’t calm himself down. Amy was up against the wall hoping he wouldn’t hurt her, or John. “Joey stop! You need to calm down before someone gets hurt!”

» Posted By Alyssa On 11.21.2014 @ 8:40 pm

blurry

I can’t see without my contacts or glasses. Without them, everything is blurry. I realized the other day, that I wouldn’t survive in a zombie apocalypse because I don’t have 20/20 vision.

» Posted By Alyssa On 07.23.2014 @ 8:38 pm

cornered

I watched him as he looked through the stained glass window. He had to have at least let the thought enter his mind. He couldn’t have shut it out like that. It was impossible. He’s always been the quiet type but never like this. He had to have known it hurt to wat

» Posted By alyssa On 06.16.2014 @ 12:02 pm

interested

I had shaped the glass with precision. Each curve into the next, a blurring rainbow of color. It swung low and out, like a ballet dancer. The colors were a smooth transition. My first piece- the buyer wasn’t interested.

» Posted By Alyssa On 03.31.2014 @ 4:48 pm

adolescent

They tell me I’m an adolescent now. What does that even mean? I’m old enough to waitress, I guess. I have more chores. I’m an adolescent. So close to being all grown up. Gone, away to college. I’m so afraid. My hands shake all the time. How am I almost done growing up?

» Posted By Alyssa On 03.30.2014 @ 5:04 pm

security

I need people to feel secure. They talk for me whenever I need them. They remind me when what I’m doing is wrong. My greatest fear is to be without people. Who would help me?

» Posted By Alyssa On 03.29.2014 @ 8:47 pm

support

It was all together. Each limb supported another, which in turn, supported another, and another, and so on. It was infinite, stretching up into the sky and yawning out above our heads.

» Posted By Alyssa On 03.28.2014 @ 4:31 pm

motivated

I was running up the stairs with a sudden motivation. It was truth, all of it. My feet stepped in time with the music thumping through the walls. Unbelievable, really! That was it, that was why everything had happened.

» Posted By Alyssa On 03.27.2014 @ 3:04 pm

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