It began as just a way to get attention.
To bury oneself in shock and awe.
To finally stand out amongst the crowd of down gazers,
noses plugged into whatever is happening
anywhere but here.
But your little stunt snapped them into the present.
Like a tiny lightbulb flash.
Making them have to actually come face-to-face with
what they…[Read more]
High up in the dusty attic.
Flaps weaved shut.
Below the layers of newspaper clips from a better time.
The final recording of his voice, his radio show,
He worked his whole life to make them.
Call it a feebile attempt to try an make something, anything, that could out last time.
But a generation later,
it is but a…[Read more]
They crawl across the dark living room wall,
as if to be a gentle, almost ghostly warning shot
that the hard conversation,
the one that can’t be avoided,
is about to explode
as soon as he parks.
The only thing standing in the way
is a sullen walk up the driveway.
I am a resident of the hotel of love-
And you are the one who gave me lease;
I cannot leave
It’s too addicting
You’re always around
And i’m always surrounded
I’m never alone
even if sometimes I feel alone
But I know you’re there
Not too far away.
It’s a rollercoaster of emotions
Trying to upkeep
And keep it all glued together
But I…[Read more]
All I hear anymore is a faint ringing-
It haunts my brain
It Haunts my soul, and inner being
I can’t stop picking up signals
You’re right there in front on me
Or so it feels like
But you’re real
With arms wide open-
You tell me things are going to be okay;
As you say i look…[Read more]
I almost had you-
Things couldn’t have been more perfect
then you had to go and FUCK it up
I told you not to
I can’t force you to want me
and I am going to have to get over you.
it’ll take time
because I am so bitter towards you.
because you chose someone else over me
which makes me feel inferior
Why in the FUCK do I always do this to myself-
My mind is always thinking about shit, which makes me do dumb things.
Like chase boys around for no reason,
I’m so lonely all the time
Where did this come from?
What the hell happened-
Always incomplete thoughts are what are in my head. They never seem to finish themselves..
Fear and…[Read more]
I saw you in the mirror-
and it brought back memories
dear god i’ve missed you.
I can’t believe you’re here!
How’d you sneak in?
i sit down in front of the mirror,
and hold my hand out-
you reach out
and put yours into mine
that feeling, in the pit of my stomach
i have butterflies.
i saw you, in the mirror
then blinked, and saw me.
Doing this is much harder than I thought – watching the EURO games and trying to think of something to write with this word.
Carmel Pathways. That was the name of the homework organizer in HS, but now I’m thinking that was Carmel Connections, and Pathways was the name of it in Jr. High. Weird what info we remember, yeah?
All these noises
All these sights
They are all better with you by my side
All these emotions
All these feelings
They are all better when I’m feeling them with you
Our adventures will take us places
To places that only people dream of
Our time will come
Let’s not worry about it, my dear
Let’s enjoy what we get to hear
Let’s enjoy what we…[Read more]
You cannot see me
you cannot see yourself
we cannot see each other
we’re hiding where its safe and sound
don’t cry darling, we will not be found
just close your eyes, and breathe
see what you want to see
the lights are off
we can go anywhere you want to, just tell me where
take my hand, i’ll show you how easy it is to escape
look where…[Read more]
the men run in
behind each other
like a twisted
game of follow the leader.
they inch down the floor
the bouncing ball sound
just a bit off
beat with the patter of their feet.
the same uniform,
like the threads of a persian rug
only halfway made.
He sped down the highway, his top down, blaring the radio. A beautiful blonde stood just atop the hill, thumb extended. He slowed down casually and inspected her. The sun was shining off of her brilliant hair, sweat gleaming off of her. She was short, petite. Defenseless.
“Awfully hot day to just be wondering the road. Want something to drink?”…[Read more]
tutoring always makes me think of the old Ball State tutoring office, which was one of the best jobs on campus, and were thus impossible to get. I didn’t try very hard to get an on campus job, and I really wish I had. It would’ve been a lot easier, and would’ve made the work/ study balance much easier.
My vision is blurry in the morning if I don’t eat breakfast, and my patterns have been off since our engagement ended. I sleep much later, and working from home only feeds into that pattern. I’ve been skipping meals to the point that my body doesn’t always remember that it’s hungry. I need more regular sleep, and to eat as soon as I wake up.
I’ve never done a really great prank. The closest I’ve come is rickrolling my friends into going to meatspin.com (do not go there). I used to send things like, “hey our school just recruited the #3 QB in the country” and send a link that looked like ESPN, only to have them get meatspun. It’s been years since I’ve gotten my buddy with that. I might…[Read more]