Avec toi, I can live independently.
You don’t need me
for every blink
of your day.
This can’t last. I won’t let it. It’s easy for me to get bored when I’m not constantly being depended on, so I will lose focus of you the moment I leave your side.
But it’s perfect for me for what it is. I provide for you what I want to, yet I don’t feel that you rely on me for everything. What I get to do in the here,now is going to take me into the there,then. I’m righting so many past wrongs. I’m talking to my mathematics ex-teammates.
In another world, I may have called these women colleagues and lovers. Yesterday, they were simply listeners. And they listened to a unwritten lovestory.
A roadtrip to Tahoe? One of the few major west coast locations I haven’t seen yet, and I’m heading there next month.
I remember on an early frosted morning in November last year, someone asked me what I was writing, “You writin’ Love Songs?” I sheepishly shot him a quick “No.” I was afraid to admit to myself that I could be an amazing songwriter, well, truly, I was embarrassed.
I was ashamed of my darker shades. Now that I have embraced them with a manly fervor, I don’t have to waste my life trying to fix the things that make me my own. I can transform them into creative passion. Just one of the indescribable things of cocooning for winter until I figured out what I wanted from life.
And I can be the friend that I never understood how to be. Or I can choose to be that independent wolf that seeks his own trail and new territory.
I am in some ways today younger than I was in sixth grade when I grew my first lightning white hair.
No phone today,
a breathe of air given to her way,
Ses cheveux bruns et
ses yeux verts
No more waking up late. Just back to being late because I want to be, when did I ever go to work because I was told to?
Who made me addicted to working for the sake of working?
What happened to the me that lived life in their chaotic butterfly effect?
Achieving the dischord of David, I write about about sexual assault, and see the quality justify poetic thoughts. Someone told me my life sounds like a sonnet this week.
I see these fragments of my fragrance. And I’m reminded I’m Amazing.
I am pleased with myself in every way. Only twentyfour years of life?
I’ve done so much on the West Coast from border-to-border and everything in-between.
Lately, I’ve been tapping into deeper memories in deeper details. Things like recalling parties in color during my year known as Black Out.
That one person I remember meeting again the next day when she asked “do you remember me?” I can answer her question four and a half years later with a yes instead of an apology
Faded birthdays have re-emerged with friends’s freckles, brothers’ hazings, womens’ lusts.
Drugs I denied for these recent years of my life, I think I can finally accept the reality.
The reality that if someone offered me an experience while blacked out, I wouldn’t have said no. The reality that heroine and other opiates have likely coursed through my veins.
And I’m ready to do even more. There is just one dream that I regret
trying harder for.
I should be in Paris, France. I was afraid of being with her forever. I was afraid of joblessness, I was afraid of homelessness. Now my fears are with my emotions.
They exist, but only just so. My anger is still immeasurable, but I doesn’t have its way with me. I drink when I want to and break things that I need to because I choose so.
I have the right to yell, I have the right to be uncensored, I have the right to explore the world. I want to dive deep into invisible caverns, drink real wine on floating city Venice.
And I want to travel the world and dive deep into sweet foreign pussy, and drink their body’s nectar. I want to show the world a beast made man.
I want to fuck more than ugly one-nights, beautiful models, average friends. I want strippers, exotic dancers, housewives, college freshmen when I’m forty, the assholes of Brazilians, the mouths of Argentinians, Polish, Russian, Iraqi. All of them.
I felt empty. Sad. Alone. Was he avoiding me? All I wanted was to wrap myself in his embrace, and I couldn’t… I never could. Ever since I told him how I felt all he did was dodge every even I would be at. I didn’t know what to do. He’s my b best friend after all. I…. I love him. In every sense of the word. I just wanted to be with him.
This situation was easily avoidable. It all started with me handing in a late homework assignemnt. if I had done that homework it will never have happened.
If I avoided writing until I could avoid no more, then what would I have achieved but putting off the inevitable until a later time. This the second day I’ve been trying this shit and I can’t figure out how to say anything.
I avoid writing like the plague. Why? I don’t know. I hate feeling inadequate, and second guessing myself all the time. It’s difficult to write – and even more difficult to avoid it.
avoided.. hmm. something I do frequently I guess. Avoid what I don’t like to associate myself with. It is easier to be happy if sad circumstances are avoided. It is easier to be possitive if one avoids associating with negatives. sImple
leaning too heavy i’m not your mother i am not responsible for you and your problems i love you but not enough and when they ask me why i have avoided you i can only point at my chest and tell them it was for my own good
I avoided the train, but only just. As it pulled out of the station, I slowed to a walk, panting, looking as if I had tried my best to catch it, and then I stared after the retreating end of the car for a while before turning back.
She avoided me. My heart is breaking, I feel as though I am a shell of a person. I don’t understand why she is doing this to me; I don’t know what I did. I lover her. I hope she will come back..
How dare she read my message and not respond. She could at least send one of those awkward smiley faces, but no – I am sitting here, with nothing. Nothing at all. I am a shell of an avoided person.
I shook his hand and the pact was sealed. I would promise not to bring the subject up ever again. The Subject was to be avoided at all costs for evermore. Even reminding him that there should be no come back should he be on his deathbed
Today i completely avoided the dishes. i have sucessfully tackled all other areas of the house yet i have had the same set of dishes needed to be done the past four days. its disgusting lol. i plan to tackle them tomorrow after work and basketball. now that i think of it i might not have any time to do them, i have a full day planned tomorrow !
There are things that we need after a battle has ended. After the dust has settled. There are things that we believe need to be avoided. For me it was his touch, her touch. The smile of a child wanting something or needing something. My hands, you see, had become empty. I had nothing but ash to give, and I saw what love could be reduced to. More ash.
I avoid lots of thing, like the work I need to do, the fact that I need to work out, my own conscience. I hate people who avoid things but that makes me hypocritical. I need to stop avoiding school so i can actually pass and not disappoint my family.
you skim across
gilded lakes
your feathery touch
etching impressions, connections
on the crystalline surface of your canvas
others marvel at your masterpiece
and you are a master
as you skim over
drowning hands
your silent judgement
leaving lacerations, punishment for “forgiven” altercations
crushing what you would avoid
beneath the crystalline surface of your cage
the closures led them down a muddy road.
a small herd of cows was basking in brown glory.
they couldn’t budge the animals.
so instead they joined them.
it was a good day,
a good rainy day that wasn’t supposed to turn out this way.
I’ve avoided everything that’s come at me in life. When my mom looked at me, I avoided eye contact, when my teacher threw assignments at me, I avoided them by losing the books or the paperwork. I’ve dodged responsibility for all my twenty-two years of life, so how is it now that I’ve had the biggest pressure dropped on me all of the sudden? How is it that after all this practice, I can’t dodge this bullet and there’s no real way for me to avoid the situation this time but…
I can’t do it. I can’t be a dad.
Under normal circumstances, I avoided crowded placed. More than that, I avoided churches. A lot of time had passed since I was last inside one, and despite the fact that Is till prayed, I wasn’t sure God heard me anymore. I wasn’t human. I couldn’t die. I couldn’t be saved from this life. Not even by him.
Scared, moving away as I crouched below the overhang of the storefront. Moonlight illuminated the ground around me, highlighting the shadow engulfing me. I felt entangled by the fear which shocked me right down to the core of my heart.
i’ve avoided it like the plague. everyone else around me asks in hushed whispers, but i stay away. i do not want to speak her name on my flushed lips. i do not want to picture her smile in my mind. it is far too painful to think about living in a world where my mother is not at my side. at seventeen i feel as though i now need her the most, and she is not with me any longer. i’ve avoided it like the plague, and still they talk. still they talk.
I avoided her like no one else
but she came to me in dreams
and cried when I pushed her away
what else is there to do?
the endless guilt from what I’ve done-
I can not stay away any longer
The only kid to be seen as nothing. Nothing is what they called him. Nobody on a better day. Was it isolation? Was it avoiding of others? What makes him nobody?
Last to be seen, last to be noticed, last to be cared about. She was at the bottom of everyone’s list. She was avoided. That was until someone took special interest in her, and it changed her life to change his.
I fell upon my family as I avoided all my problems. Everything I had ever hoped for or dreamed, fell though a deep pit of despair and perfume of my life. Everything was but an illusion, and I was avoiding the inevitable.
It wasn’t too bad at first, just walking an extra block. I didn’t have to look at it. Didn’t have to think about her. Then it started at home too. That vase, the way she’d smiled when we got it for her. How she used to look out the window, smiling as morning sun warmed her face. I spent less time at home, walked farther away. That park, the way we always used to stop and watch the ducks. The shop we only stopped at once to laugh at the clothes. She was everywhere.
He avoided the topic all day. Dodging it the way frogger dodges a car in the street, or doesn’t. Like any game his avoidance had to come to an end. He turned the corner and there she was.
I don’t look people in the eye. Almost never. I like him. On occasion I even look at him. Though generally when some subjects come up, looking in each others vicinity is avoided altogether.
Sometimes, I avoid the hallway in the morning,
because I know I’ll see you across the way.
(I know the boiling point of blood,
and I do not wish to scald these veins.)
Sometimes, I contemplate painting
over you, like every other problem
that struck like loss and lightning.
However, I remember you in rain,
and I remember you in beds when I curl
in and long to whisper insides out.
Sometimes, I feel like I have to
deal with this: One cannot live
their whole lives disgusted by a mirror.
estoy evitando darme cuenta de algunas cosas que me hacen mal pero no se como dejar o si se como dejar pero es difícil y no tengo ganas. O tengo miedo. La vagancia y el miedo son mis dos mayores obstáculos para casi todo. Creo. No se.
He should avoided him, but it was that tone of voice that got him every single time. It was that shrill tone that only an asshole could muster. He walked straight up to him and without a word rocked back and produced such a jab that it sent him flying back into the wall.
Today’s Second One Word —
Avec toi, I can live independently.
You don’t need me
for every blink
of your day.
This can’t last. I won’t let it. It’s easy for me to get bored when I’m not constantly being depended on, so I will lose focus of you the moment I leave your side.
But it’s perfect for me for what it is. I provide for you what I want to, yet I don’t feel that you rely on me for everything. What I get to do in the here,now is going to take me into the there,then. I’m righting so many past wrongs. I’m talking to my mathematics ex-teammates.
In another world, I may have called these women colleagues and lovers. Yesterday, they were simply listeners. And they listened to a unwritten lovestory.
A roadtrip to Tahoe? One of the few major west coast locations I haven’t seen yet, and I’m heading there next month.
I remember on an early frosted morning in November last year, someone asked me what I was writing, “You writin’ Love Songs?” I sheepishly shot him a quick “No.” I was afraid to admit to myself that I could be an amazing songwriter, well, truly, I was embarrassed.
I was ashamed of my darker shades. Now that I have embraced them with a manly fervor, I don’t have to waste my life trying to fix the things that make me my own. I can transform them into creative passion. Just one of the indescribable things of cocooning for winter until I figured out what I wanted from life.
And I can be the friend that I never understood how to be. Or I can choose to be that independent wolf that seeks his own trail and new territory.
I am in some ways today younger than I was in sixth grade when I grew my first lightning white hair.
No phone today,
a breathe of air given to her way,
Ses cheveux bruns et
ses yeux verts
No more waking up late. Just back to being late because I want to be, when did I ever go to work because I was told to?
Who made me addicted to working for the sake of working?
What happened to the me that lived life in their chaotic butterfly effect?
Achieving the dischord of David, I write about about sexual assault, and see the quality justify poetic thoughts. Someone told me my life sounds like a sonnet this week.
I see these fragments of my fragrance. And I’m reminded I’m Amazing.
I am pleased with myself in every way. Only twentyfour years of life?
I’ve done so much on the West Coast from border-to-border and everything in-between.
Lately, I’ve been tapping into deeper memories in deeper details. Things like recalling parties in color during my year known as Black Out.
That one person I remember meeting again the next day when she asked “do you remember me?” I can answer her question four and a half years later with a yes instead of an apology
Faded birthdays have re-emerged with friends’s freckles, brothers’ hazings, womens’ lusts.
Drugs I denied for these recent years of my life, I think I can finally accept the reality.
The reality that if someone offered me an experience while blacked out, I wouldn’t have said no. The reality that heroine and other opiates have likely coursed through my veins.
And I’m ready to do even more. There is just one dream that I regret
trying harder for.
I should be in Paris, France. I was afraid of being with her forever. I was afraid of joblessness, I was afraid of homelessness. Now my fears are with my emotions.
They exist, but only just so. My anger is still immeasurable, but I doesn’t have its way with me. I drink when I want to and break things that I need to because I choose so.
I have the right to yell, I have the right to be uncensored, I have the right to explore the world. I want to dive deep into invisible caverns, drink real wine on floating city Venice.
And I want to travel the world and dive deep into sweet foreign pussy, and drink their body’s nectar. I want to show the world a beast made man.
I want to fuck more than ugly one-nights, beautiful models, average friends. I want strippers, exotic dancers, housewives, college freshmen when I’m forty, the assholes of Brazilians, the mouths of Argentinians, Polish, Russian, Iraqi. All of them.
I felt empty. Sad. Alone. Was he avoiding me? All I wanted was to wrap myself in his embrace, and I couldn’t… I never could. Ever since I told him how I felt all he did was dodge every even I would be at. I didn’t know what to do. He’s my b best friend after all. I…. I love him. In every sense of the word. I just wanted to be with him.
This situation was easily avoidable. It all started with me handing in a late homework assignemnt. if I had done that homework it will never have happened.
like the unlike
I avoided you
now i want you to listen
this song
for you to know
my muse is you
i hope
not to making
something worthwhile
out of the place
i’m not anymore
avoiding you
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there are certain foods that should be avoided like too much fat, sugar and salt. I don’t like fat but I do like salty snacks and chocolate!
If I avoided writing until I could avoid no more, then what would I have achieved but putting off the inevitable until a later time. This the second day I’ve been trying this shit and I can’t figure out how to say anything.
I avoid writing like the plague. Why? I don’t know. I hate feeling inadequate, and second guessing myself all the time. It’s difficult to write – and even more difficult to avoid it.
keeping yourself away from the things you do not really like.
avoided.. hmm. something I do frequently I guess. Avoid what I don’t like to associate myself with. It is easier to be happy if sad circumstances are avoided. It is easier to be possitive if one avoids associating with negatives. sImple
leaning too heavy i’m not your mother i am not responsible for you and your problems i love you but not enough and when they ask me why i have avoided you i can only point at my chest and tell them it was for my own good
I avoided the train, but only just. As it pulled out of the station, I slowed to a walk, panting, looking as if I had tried my best to catch it, and then I stared after the retreating end of the car for a while before turning back.
“Too bad,” said
She avoided me. My heart is breaking, I feel as though I am a shell of a person. I don’t understand why she is doing this to me; I don’t know what I did. I lover her. I hope she will come back..
How dare she read my message and not respond. She could at least send one of those awkward smiley faces, but no – I am sitting here, with nothing. Nothing at all. I am a shell of an avoided person.
I shook his hand and the pact was sealed. I would promise not to bring the subject up ever again. The Subject was to be avoided at all costs for evermore. Even reminding him that there should be no come back should he be on his deathbed
Today i completely avoided the dishes. i have sucessfully tackled all other areas of the house yet i have had the same set of dishes needed to be done the past four days. its disgusting lol. i plan to tackle them tomorrow after work and basketball. now that i think of it i might not have any time to do them, i have a full day planned tomorrow !
There are things that we need after a battle has ended. After the dust has settled. There are things that we believe need to be avoided. For me it was his touch, her touch. The smile of a child wanting something or needing something. My hands, you see, had become empty. I had nothing but ash to give, and I saw what love could be reduced to. More ash.
I avoid lots of thing, like the work I need to do, the fact that I need to work out, my own conscience. I hate people who avoid things but that makes me hypocritical. I need to stop avoiding school so i can actually pass and not disappoint my family.
you skim across
gilded lakes
your feathery touch
etching impressions, connections
on the crystalline surface of your canvas
others marvel at your masterpiece
and you are a master
as you skim over
drowning hands
your silent judgement
leaving lacerations, punishment for “forgiven” altercations
crushing what you would avoid
beneath the crystalline surface of your cage
the closures led them down a muddy road.
a small herd of cows was basking in brown glory.
they couldn’t budge the animals.
so instead they joined them.
it was a good day,
a good rainy day that wasn’t supposed to turn out this way.
I’ve avoided everything that’s come at me in life. When my mom looked at me, I avoided eye contact, when my teacher threw assignments at me, I avoided them by losing the books or the paperwork. I’ve dodged responsibility for all my twenty-two years of life, so how is it now that I’ve had the biggest pressure dropped on me all of the sudden? How is it that after all this practice, I can’t dodge this bullet and there’s no real way for me to avoid the situation this time but…
I can’t do it. I can’t be a dad.
Under normal circumstances, I avoided crowded placed. More than that, I avoided churches. A lot of time had passed since I was last inside one, and despite the fact that Is till prayed, I wasn’t sure God heard me anymore. I wasn’t human. I couldn’t die. I couldn’t be saved from this life. Not even by him.
Scared, moving away as I crouched below the overhang of the storefront. Moonlight illuminated the ground around me, highlighting the shadow engulfing me. I felt entangled by the fear which shocked me right down to the core of my heart.
i’ve avoided it like the plague. everyone else around me asks in hushed whispers, but i stay away. i do not want to speak her name on my flushed lips. i do not want to picture her smile in my mind. it is far too painful to think about living in a world where my mother is not at my side. at seventeen i feel as though i now need her the most, and she is not with me any longer. i’ve avoided it like the plague, and still they talk. still they talk.
I avoided her like no one else
but she came to me in dreams
and cried when I pushed her away
what else is there to do?
the endless guilt from what I’ve done-
I can not stay away any longer
The only kid to be seen as nothing. Nothing is what they called him. Nobody on a better day. Was it isolation? Was it avoiding of others? What makes him nobody?
Last to be seen, last to be noticed, last to be cared about. She was at the bottom of everyone’s list. She was avoided. That was until someone took special interest in her, and it changed her life to change his.
I fell upon my family as I avoided all my problems. Everything I had ever hoped for or dreamed, fell though a deep pit of despair and perfume of my life. Everything was but an illusion, and I was avoiding the inevitable.
My life was but an unavoidable darkness.
Sarah avoided her homework like a plague. Even though she should’ve done it in the first place, now was not the time to regret.
It wasn’t too bad at first, just walking an extra block. I didn’t have to look at it. Didn’t have to think about her. Then it started at home too. That vase, the way she’d smiled when we got it for her. How she used to look out the window, smiling as morning sun warmed her face. I spent less time at home, walked farther away. That park, the way we always used to stop and watch the ducks. The shop we only stopped at once to laugh at the clothes. She was everywhere.
He avoided the topic all day. Dodging it the way frogger dodges a car in the street, or doesn’t. Like any game his avoidance had to come to an end. He turned the corner and there she was.
I don’t look people in the eye. Almost never. I like him. On occasion I even look at him. Though generally when some subjects come up, looking in each others vicinity is avoided altogether.
Sometimes, I avoid the hallway in the morning,
because I know I’ll see you across the way.
(I know the boiling point of blood,
and I do not wish to scald these veins.)
Sometimes, I contemplate painting
over you, like every other problem
that struck like loss and lightning.
However, I remember you in rain,
and I remember you in beds when I curl
in and long to whisper insides out.
Sometimes, I feel like I have to
deal with this: One cannot live
their whole lives disgusted by a mirror.
stayed away from. I avoided the dog when it started growling. To avoid some things is very wise. To keep away from or prevent something.
no se que poner aca
estoy evitando darme cuenta de algunas cosas que me hacen mal pero no se como dejar o si se como dejar pero es difícil y no tengo ganas. O tengo miedo. La vagancia y el miedo son mis dos mayores obstáculos para casi todo. Creo. No se.
He should avoided him, but it was that tone of voice that got him every single time. It was that shrill tone that only an asshole could muster. He walked straight up to him and without a word rocked back and produced such a jab that it sent him flying back into the wall.